The Lord - and Lady - of the Rings

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P.S. Another Blog Comments Disabled Entry.

Running out of time breath

It was 2.45am in the ungodly hour and I was still tossing about in my bed, trying to get some decent sleep. To think that I was supposed to wake up at 5.45am for my half-marathon training, I could not help but to wonder if I would be able to make it to work on time at 11am.

Yeah, it was limitation all over again. :P The only difference is that this time, I have registered myself instead of just stopping at planning to do so.

Many of us might not know about this but Milo does contain caffeine, though in a smaller amount compared to coffee. It was certainly a mistake of mine to have a cup as supper which resulted in the owl-like awareness during bedtime. I was so wide awake that I actually decided to just expedite the jogging schedule to 3am if I still failed to fall asleep by then.

By 5.15am, I was wide awake again. Sensing no point in trying to gain myself another half an hour's rest, I got myself geared up and hit the 5.5km path that I had plotted a day earlier. The aim was to make two rounds, which is equivalent to around 11km.


You may want to view the larger map to save your eyesight.

I usually hit the jogging path along the Air Itam dam as the air there is much cleaner but it was too far away for - almost - daily practice.

Unfortunately, while drafting this new route, I failed to take into consideration the terrace houses along the road. Dogs barked non-stop even from a distance away and if any of these gates were not locked properly, it would be my LIFE that I am running for, instead of this silly marathon.

The previous night's Milo-drenched breads did not help much as it aggravated my IBS (irritable bowel syndrome), which in turn caused my mouth and anus to burp non-stop all the way.

It was not until the 3.2km mark that I made my first stop due to my left shoe's undone shoelace. It was at this point in time that the progress started going downhill. Bending down to tie the shoelace proved to be a grave mistake as I started to experience dizziness with the butterflies in my stomach threatening to throw all its contents out my mouth. Now that I recall it, I find it funny how my mouth had to start multitasking:

• gasping for air
• taking over my nose's task of exhaling carbon dioxide
• belching out the air trapped in my stomach
• yawning
• getting itself ready to puke

A few hundred meters of slow walk later, my condition improved a little and I managed to switch to the running gear again.

Jogging along main roads has its pros and cons. Main roads are usually brighter and you do not need to fear for any up-to-no-good stranger lurking around in dark corners. However, you will have to compromise on the air quality due to the higher frequency of vehicles compared to those smaller roads. Imagine yourself fighting for air to land another foot forward when out of no where, an old bus leaves you enveloped in a cloud of black, smelly smoke in its wake. That was so demoralizing that I almost took the shortest route home while questioning my earlier self on the need to torment myself over this RM40 race.

I broke down again - temporarily - at the 4.6km mark due to the recurring nauseatic sensation before pushing myself home to complete the 5.5km.

36 minutes 16 seconds.

My initial goal was to complete 10km in an hour. To fail that is bad but to spend so much time just for 5.5km, that is bad bad bad! Compared to the yesteryears, my stamina is clearly fizzling away. Is this a sign of age catching up?

-sigh-

I sincerely hope that this failure will not linger on. To quote Mr. Fail-A-Lot, Thomas Edison:

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

Good luck to myself on my next attempt, scheduled to be on this coming Tuesday.

Jangan marah ya?

Incompetent. That is the only word that I can think of - at this very moment - that best describes the Immigration Department of Malaysia, Georgetown branch.

I had prepared all the necessary documents for a new passport as indicated in the official website and taking into consideration the worst case scenario, I had also intentionally booked myself an annual leave today just to make sure that I do not have to stress myself crazy over appearing late for work. After all, everyone is pretty well aware of the speed slowness those government staffs usually go about with their work.

Apparently, the worst case scenario that I got myself ready for was not exactly the worst. Tell me, how do you label a scenario that is much worse than the worst case scenario itself?

I reached the department at 9.20am and discovered that I need to have a photocopy of my MyKad.

Me: Can you help me to print a copy with one of the internal photocopy machines that you guys have?
Officer: No.

Me: Can I have a ticket number first while I get to the nearest shop with photocopy machine?
Officer: No.

Fine! The nearest shop with photocopy machine was congested and it took me 40 minutes to get back to the department again. I was given a ticket with number 1176 and the current number in the queue was 1060 WTF?! There were 116 applications to go and yet, they refused to give me a number before I went off to get myself a photocopy of my MyKad?

There were six counters to receive applications but it was not until 2.30pm that 1176 was finally announced. One look at my passport photos and the Indian lady told me that my hair covered too much of my temple WTF?! After more than five hours of waiting with no lunch nor a sip of water, this is the best excuse she could come up with to reject my application? With the amount of crowd in the building lingering about, she agreed to put my application on hold while I went to get another two copies of valid passport photo.

It was raining cats and dogs but 20 minutes later, I came back to the counter with two new pieces of passport photos, albeit very much uglier compared to the one that I took a day earlier. My MyKad photo was so bad that it had become a constant jokes among my friends so the last thing I wanted was a passport with exact ugly photo but after getting myself trapped in the sardine-packed building with my stomach growling non-stop, I did not give it a damn anymore as long as they handover me a new passport.

I told the Indian lady that I wanted to make a five-year passport which is equivalent to RM300. After three digital thumbprint scannings and an old-fashioned thumbprint with ink pad on the document, I was asked to wait for my name to be called for payment. True enough, my name was announced and this time, it was a Malay lady who demanded for RM100.

RM100? I told her that it was meant to be RM300 but she replied that I applied for a two-year passport. Again, I was told to take a seat while she sorted it out with the Indian lady.

It was 3.20pm when the Indian lady beckoned me to come over to her counter. Somehow or rather, she accidentally filled me up for a two-year passport in the digital application form and I have to go through another round of digital thumbprint scannings. Another sila duduk dulu as she claimed that she has to wait for her boss to approve these changes.

3.40pm and her boss finally came back - from his tea break I guess - and with a few looks on my document on his table, he called for the Indian lady again. The rain which had stopped pouring earlier came crashing again, as if dancing to the rhythm of my mood. After a chat or two, the Indian lady requested for me to attend to her counter again. Three thumbprint scannings again and sensing my dark, clouded face, she still had the audacity to utter a line of jangan marah ya?

MARAH?! BENCI ada la KNNMCB! was what I almost blurted out. After shoving the RM300 to the Malay lady, I was finally told that they would no longer be able to process my application by today, which literally means that I shall have to make myself present tomorrow to collect the passport WTF?!


At that very moment, I was so pissed off that responding her with f*ck you was no longer a vulgarity but a compliment instead.

As a result, I have to give my manager a call to apply for another day of annual leave. To sum it all up, I achieved totally nothing today but wasted the following:

• nearly 7 hours caged in a narrow building with malfunctioning air-conditioners
• skipped my lunch
• missed my opportunity to cancel my UOB credit card
• wasted 2 days of annual leave
• failed to set up a meeting with my insurance agent

I wonder if this is part of Najib's 1Malaysia, where rakyat didahulukan, pencapaian diutamakan (people first, performance now). Gee, if that is the case, thanks, but no thanks then.

-sigh-

I sincerely hope that this was an exceptional case... or have I just stumbled upon the same type of cancer that Y.B. Jeff mentioned in his blog not very long ago?