Inde-SIGH-siveness

Portal 2

2011-05-19T15:51:00.009+08:00

I don't usually write about games so when you see me writing one, you can be darned sure that it's a good piece worthy of my ever-packed schedule and effort.

These days, most PC games come in a package of deemed-as-must-have-features: High-definition graphical rendition, adrenaline-pumping actions, explosions everywhere that would put Michael Bay to shame, damsels in ~~revealing clothes~~ distress and mind-boggling titles such as Mass Effect and Dragon Age, just to name a few. Both installments of Portal are none of these. Heck, even the title itself is pretty lame and boring. Portal? Meh~

I admit that I'm guilty of being an extreme cheapskate. I got my first taste of Portal when Steam gave it for free in conjunction with the release of Steam for Mac. Well, you don't expect me to pay for a game which even the developer themselves were not confident of selling well, do you? A year later, I received Portal 2 - also for free - by joining an ARG (alternate reality game) which I must say, was very well-written by fellow lowyat.net forum moderator, frags. I won it, so yes, I'm absolutely positive that it's a well written article, no denying that. ;)

Joke aside, allow me to brief you through on what Portal is all about. The premise is simple. You're a test subject who was being jolted awake from deep stasis sleep to run some experiments, all in the name of science. No no no... throw the Bunsen burners and all those secondary school's chemistry class peripherals out of your mind. The aforementioned science experiments involve you making your way from Point A to Point B which sounds pretty simple, except for the various obstacles in between that would not hesitate to remind you that you're no God. However, thanks to the portal gun, you're one step closer.

Point B = exit.

The portal gun is able to open 2 portals, a blue and an orange. Enter the blue portal and you will emerge out from the orange portal. The same goes the other way.

Need a mirror? Shoot yourself a pair of portals at perpendicular walls.

As you delve deeper into the Aperture Laboratories, you will come to learn on how the portals can be abused to propel you to unreachable heights and distances.

Thanks to Newton for gravity.

Plot-wise, Portal 2 picks up from where Portal ends and apart from introducing a whole lot of new mechanisms, the staggering jump in price is evident enough to reflect the game's successful transition from a mere experiment in the first installment to a full-blown game in Portal 2. This in turn echoes the developer's new-found confidence in not only fulfilling, but to surpass the expectation that has been levied by Portal fans worldwide!

I'm not entirely sure what others seek or feel when they play Portals but personally, I was able to relate the games' puzzles to my daily real life. In each of the chambers, it has been made clear to us that there is only 1 exit and we have all the equipments required to get us there. In short, we're totally aware that all the puzzles are perfectly solvable and the only thing preventing us from walking through that door across the room was the lack of solution or the know-hows. Just like in real life, we encounter complex problems all the time and when it comes to that, we either spend quite some time solving it or give it up altogether. It can't be helped as more often than not, there is no clue on whether we have the necessary hardware or skill-sets to take us through. In fact, we don't even know how many exit points do we have or worse, perhaps there was none at all? This is the very reason I don't look for walkthroughs whenever I was stuck in some chambers for hours. If I couldn't solve these puzzles with such big handicaps, I'm pretty sure my future would be nothing short of bleak.

-sigh-

Anyway, that was just me and myself. If you happen to stumble upon this entry based on the 2 piece of clues that I planted in the lowyat.net forum, give yourself a pat on your back and treat yourself to a piece of this delicious and moist cake.

And yes, I'm afraid that the cake IS a lie.

As a token of gratitude to fellow forum members who has showered me with support and also to commemorate my success in attaining the Safe Trader tag, I'm giving away a copy of Portal (not Portal 2!) to the first person who repost the URL that brought him / her here, in the forum thread where the clues were found. Remember, nothing but the URL or else your attempt will be forfeited!

To be fair to readers who frequented this blog of mine as well, I shall post another set of clues below and just like the above scenario, go to the URL and post the same there. If you have owned a copy of Portal, I shall leave the decision to you on whether to withdraw or keep / pass the game to someone else. To avoid any misinterpretation, I need to stress that I only have a copy for reward, not 2.

Clue #1.

Clue #2.

As a curtain closer, please enjoy this beautiful song and I sincerely hope that you'll enjoy the game as much as I do. :)

Standard Four

2011-02-25T20:39:00.025+08:00

Today marks the first day of the tenth year we've been together. Ten years are not short and if someone were to tell you that ten years are just a blink of an eye away, please feel free to pummel him into a pulp for me.

Like all couples out there, we've been through a lot. The road we've treaded on together for the past decade is full of obstacles but we endured. We prevailed. Friedrich Nietzsche once said "What does not kill me, makes me stronger" and I couldn't agree more.

For the first few years, we had to keep our relationship a secret. I would wake up in the ungodly hours and ran out to the main road just to catch a glimpse of waifu waiting for her school bus. To the other girls across the road, I may looked like an idiot. Waifu couldn't acknowledge my presence by waving her hand or anything but her smile certainly made me a happy idiot. From a blue pinafore to a blue skirt, these were our good mornings to each another.

The first time we were photographed together.

We seldom got to go out together. For the few times we managed to sneak out, we had to avoid the crowd and keep it low. Shopping complexes were a big no-no and they were too noisy anyway. We needed somewhere quiet to talk, to open up to each another.

Large boulders make good couple seats.

Initially, we tried hiking. It was fun but tiring and time consuming. By the time we found ourselves a good spot, the sun was almost up in its glory. Lulled by the cool hill breeze, waifu soon drifted into her own dreamworld, pillowing on my shoulder. The sun was not letting up and being the gentleman, I shielded her with an umbrella, only to suffer from sore shoulders for the rest of the week. To see her snuggly sleeping face up close, that was indeed priceless!

We then tried the beach and it remained our most favourite rendezvous for many years to come.

I build ~~and she demolishes~~ sandcastles.

Dancing in the shades.

Neither of us can afford a camera so we pooled our savings and once we had accumulated enough, we bought ourselves a single-use camera. Even though the quality was laughable - the body itself was made out of cardboard - the photos it captured held a lot of memory for the both of us.

Our first picture perfect came from the very last film frame.

Ahh... reminiscing the good old days sure feel good, eh? I can go on forever but I have to put a stop here or else I shall have nothing to write when we hit another decade later. :D Anyway, waifu just gave me a humongous surprise two weeks back.

A platinum ring to pair with the solitaire ring that I proposed her with.

Judging from the width of the ring, I'm pretty sure it cost her a bomb and being the kind that appreciates financial stability more than anything, she must have hesitated for some time before taking such a big leap of faith. It was something so unexpected that my face almost went BSOD.

And did I mention that the ring was of the right size and required no further alteration? Awesome!

I guess I'm not too bad either. Among the many things I pride myself in, one of them would be to correctly guess the right shirt size for waifu without having her around to test them out.

A Hush Puppy baby tee...

... and a matching box.

Mind you, it wasn't easy for me to go around hunting for these gifts. I was literally fidgetting all over the place before I finally came out like Mr. Parker below:

Happy 10th Anniversary WAIFU!

I look forward to the many years and decades to come. :)

Are you retarded? Common senseless

2011-01-25T20:59:00.003+08:00

It has been a while since I last scribbled something here but I'm afraid I'm going to start off the very first entry of 2011 in an extremely negative light. Before you read any further, I'm warning you, this is a rant entry so go no further if you don't want to spoil your good mood. If you woke up on the wrong side of the bed, do feel free to compare your experience with mine and leave me a comment or two if it somehow made you feel any better, knowing that I had smellier shit smeared on my face or the other way around.

Ahh January! The month where everything starts anew and what better way to go about it than being promoted to a new job position? Old colleagues were all smileys with congratulations being uttered here and there, only to be replied by a sheepish thank you from yours truly. Hmm... what did you say? Treat you guys to a meal? Oh sure, why not since Chinese New Year is just around the corner and we really should have a pleasant dinner together, in the hope that some of my good fortune will rub off on those deserving of luck.

Nevermind the fact that my new salary is actually lower compared to my previous position's salary plus overtime. Also nevermind the fact that you guys kept insinuating and harping about my new salary, even though at the back of my mind, I'm pretty much aware of how much higher some of you actually went *ka-ching* at the end of each month. They're all done in good jest and I can accept that but tell me; WHY THE F*CK did you have to complain about the restaurant that I suggested in front of the very person whom I actually hold in high regard but didn't dare to invite - because he was not exactly in the same team as we were?! Can't you pry your eyes open a little wider and take a look at the list of email recipients before you open that foul mouth of yours? Announce all you want about how sky-rocketing high my new salary is but please understand that I can't invite everyone I wanted to as I still have mouths to feed, loans plus bills to pay off and not to forget, a wedding to plan. If I was given the liberty to enlist a group of colleagues who had been influential to my ascension, you can be darned sure that you are nowhere to be seen at least 100 kilometers away. Well, perhaps with luck, you would stumble upon the common sense that you've dropped approximately 97 kilometers away... minimum.

I know I used to come from the same team as you guys, therefore it's easier to have me step into your shoes and understand the predicaments you're facing from your very own perspective. We were and are still friends, right? But why oh why can't you do the same and understand my limitations? I'm on training but you're insisting to have me assigned for your escalation cases. Oh sure I can do that, just got to sacrifice some of my training time and what do I have in my inbox? You dumped me the whole logs, pretty much untouched without any analysis and with all the curls nicely done too. Yes, shit has always been depicted with a spiraling curl to the top, no? So now I'm just a tool to pass the shit onto when you have no idea what's going on with your cases? One of these days, I really have to borrow your dictionary and flip around to check for your definition of friend, friend!

Next, the person who always did things 180° from what I requested and yet, had the nerve and audacity to claim that I requested him to do what he did...

-sigh-

I think I'll stop here. Writing about these common senseless people only serve to make me feel retarded myself. Like what Stephen King wrote in the Dreamcatcher, SSDD.

Same shit, different day.

Mobile Phone: Liability Or Necessity?

2010-12-06T09:54:00.012+08:00

It's a wonder how much we're relying on our mobile phones these days. Approximately a decade ago, it was something that I deemed as an icon for the rich and wealthy, no thanks to those Hong Kong films back then where the filthy rich were always portrayed with a big fat ass 大哥大. Fast forward a few years down the road, I think it's no longer an exaggeration to claim that all the people I know today own at least one mobile phone. In fact, when I went to Singapore for the first time last month, I was pretty shocked to see every single young commuters in the MRT had their eyes totally glued to their mobile phone display, either playing games, chatting or listening to songs. Physical communication was almost non-existent, save for the aged uncles and aunties of course.

Singapore is just around 2 hours away but with such a stark contrast between them and us here on how we utilize the mobile phone, I really can't fathom what to expect if I were to visit Japan - the land of the weird and bizarre - in the near future. Slurping ramen out from the mobile phone display, anyone?

I accidentally left my mobile phone charger in the office last Friday and my antique Nokia 6600's battery went flat on me a day later. Even though I do have a cordless phone at home - which I've been subconsciously trying to fit into my jeans pocket one time too many - it really struck me on how much I've been dependent on my mobile phone. Unlike the iPhone, the Nokia 6600 has very limited features and I only use it mainly for calls, SMS, recording daily expenses... and alarm.

Yes, I'm one of the cheapskates who refused to wear a watch or get myself an alarm clock. Nice to meet you.

-sigh-

It was not until Sunday evening when I realized that I had nothing to wake me up on Monday morning at 5.30am. Well, of course I could hit the bunk early but I would need a better insurance policy so I turned to waifu, who agreed right off the bat. For the record, we don't stay together under the same roof so she would be giving my cordless phone a call as a replacement alarm.

Somehow or rather, I managed to get myself out of the bed on time and after numerous failed attempts to register her mobile phone with a missed call - to indicate that I was up and about - I left for office, hoping that she would miss her own 5.30am alarm.

Around 30 minutes later and within 3 seconds of powering up my mobile phone, the ringtone rang out loud. Waifu's name danced on the display.

She actually rang my cordless phone a few times until my father picked it up and told her that I've left the house. Not satisfied, she rushed 13-storeys down her flat, jumped into the car and drove to my house, all these in the ungodly hour of 5.45am with her mobile phone by her ear, trying to reach me as soon as I've got my mobile phone booted up. It was just barely a few hundred meters away from my flat when she managed to get hold of me.

To think that a person who appreciates sleep above everything else would do all these just to ensure that I was on time for work... ~~DAMN YOU STUPID PHONE! If only your battery could sustain itself for 2 more days.~~ I'm utterly speechless. Penning this down right on the spot was the best course of action I can think of to log this down as one of the many memorable moments in my life. :)

I'm quite sure you've read this line before: every cloud has a silver lining. It is always this kind of sticky situation that reveals to you how important or how big of an influence you are in the eyes of the others. All you're required to do is just to move a step or two and take a look at the situation again, this time from a different perspective.

Dearest waifu, I promise to sing you Dido's Thank You for the rest of my life. <3

Slumbering Illusion

2010-12-05T16:43:00.004+08:00

I'm such a bad guy. I can't help laughing myself silly when I received unexpected replies from a half-asleep waifu.

She was taking an afternoon nap when her initial alarm at 2.45pm went off but was blatantly ignored. Since she was supposed to fetch her mom to the market, I decided to nudge her arm a little before she murmured with her eyes closed for 15 minutes.

Fine, you got yourself 15 minutes, young lady.

3pm and what do we have here? Another 15 minutes.

-sigh-

The cycle went on until 3.45pm and lamenting the fact that I've never bothered to ask her for a sure-win method to jog her out of dreamworld, I told myself that it was time to give her the kick.

Wait until I'm done with the dishes.

What? What dishes?

I shook her shoulders again.

I said wait until I'm done washing all these dishes!

By the time she finished that sentence, I was already on the floor laughing like a hyena. Apparently, she somehow dropped all her plastic containers, including her beloved Thermos vacuum flask into the drain and has been trying to fish them out for almost an hour.

Aww... I might be a bad guy but wouldn't you agree that she is such a cutie? :)

And no, I think the ugly but adorable definition of cute is pure bullshit.

P.S. Things were - and still are - not going very well for me so do pardon me if this doesn't satisfy the wait you've had to endure since the last blog entry. Rest assured that I'm doing my best to kickstart the writing again.

I must have been incepted to write this entry

2010-09-21T22:35:00.004+08:00

Before I begin, allow me to set an expectation that this entry will have something to do with sex and if you somehow don't feel comfortable or find this topic gross, then by all means, proceed no further.

I had a strange dream this morning where I found myself engaging in a sexual intercourse with an unknown lady. I'm not going to write a detailed observation on what actually took place but let's just say that it really scared the shit out of me. The whole thing felt so real that I think it somehow turned into lucid dreaming halfway through because I forced myself to pull out due to guilt of being disloyal to waifu.

In fact, I got so worried in the dream - Oh shit how am I going to explain myself?! - that I literally jumped out of my bed and dialed her to apologize. Yes, it was that bloody damn real that I totally lost the boundary between what was real and what was supposed to stay inside the dream world!

-sigh-

Now, here comes the interesting part that I'm very much curious about. Is the sensation that you feel down there - applicable to both genders - hardcoded into our brain? Take for example a virgin like me. So was the feeling I had in the dream the real deal or it was just some pseudo feeling that my brain generated when it failed to locate the file that has yet to be saved or experienced?

Hmm... I wonder.

What strange dream? Wet dream say wet dream la!
But I didn't get wet.

You're still a virgin? Yeah right!
This is not Ripley's blog so you're not under any obligation to believe me.

You're a pervert!
You should check Form 6's Biology syllabus.

You must be horny to have this kind of dream.
I must be pretty close to being impotent to get horny 3 times only in my life so far. :(

Here's a shirt for you:

Thank you. It's good to know that I still have something that you've lost forever and no longer recoverable.

Why are you talking to yourself?
I'm just answering them in advance.

Barli suam satu!

2010-09-10T15:14:00.017+08:00

I couldn't hide my surprise when I read about Cheong Kheng's proposal via Facebook last night. He was like the second guy I knew to propose to his partner in Bali this year alone, which kind of give me the assumption that Bali is the next best destination for romance-related activities.

Looking back, I thought that I had gone the extra mile by proposing to waifu in Langkawi island. Well, the extra mile comes from the fact that I initially intended to propose in Penang island itself, somewhere by a beach with kerosene-soaked clothes lighted up to spell something along the line of 嫁给我吗? So in a way, you can say that going down on one knee in Langkawi island instead can be considered an upgrade to the plan, though it didn't go as well as I hoped. However, to have two of my secondary schoolmates flying all the way to Bali and proposed there, my plan was truly laughable. Amateurish, if I may add. :(

-sigh-

I actually did aim to visit Bali for my honeymoon, especially after reading about the magnificient Ubud Hanging Gardens in kennysia.com but to see Cheong Kheng booking a unit there just to pop the magical question, I really need to think twice if I should proceed ahead with that intention. As if that was not enough to set me deeper into the cavern of inferiority complex, he got her a Brilliant Rose!

A. ****ing. 66-faceted. Brilliant. Rose!

That was the type of diamond ring that I wanted to buy to go along with my proposal but due to the fact that the nearest boutique is in Kuala Lumpur, I've to settle for a much more normal 58-faceted cut diamond ring instead. Yea, I know Kuala Lumpur is not really that far away but you'll have to take into consideration the scenario where you need to do some size alteration to the ring, right?

So get it. He proposed in a place that I wanted to go for my honeymoon, with a ring that I failed to get. That is definitely... a little bit depressing and boy, do I feel cheap. :(

But hey, it was a special occasion so who am I to ruin it? Moreover, to read about this on the same day that I got into a road accident - ouch my legs :'( - it sure brought a smile to my face. At least I can now put a big fat line across that FML label that I've categorized yesterday under. :)

I'm not adding their photos here since I don't want to go through all the trouble of seeking their permissions. Moreover, the chance of them reading this entry of mine is almost nil but still, a very big congratulations to both Ham Lert and Cheong Kheng!

Woo hoo~

Life is no Nintendo game

2010-08-27T20:32:00.011+08:00

Great song, don't you agree? However, I can't say the same for the series of actions as depicted in the music video itself. :(

Two nights ago, the young couple residing just beside my house quarreled again. It was in the ungodly hours of around 2am when I heard heavy foot steps and hoarse voices in the corridor outside my living room. Even though this was not the first time they reenact the whole episode in public, I couldn't help but to sit on the sofa and spied on them. The guy was almost in his birthday suit, except for a pair of brief and a towel in his hand, kungfu'ing around with his partner. Perhaps he was trying to get her back into the house or fending off her blows but I didn't really bother to catch the words that came flying out of his mouth. I was much more curious on the possibility of me going through the same thing with my spouse in the near future when we're staying together.

In the nine years plus that we've been together, we've never argued even once. Sure, there were times when we have a certain degree of disagreement but it was more on give and take, which has been superbly effective so far. However, taking into consideration the fact that we spent the majority of our nine years living far apart from each another, I'm not really sure on what to expect especially now that we've got ourselves a house.

One year of me in UUM while she was missing me in Penang.

Two years of me coding my life away for an IT degree while she got accepted into UPM.

Another two years of me trying to eke a living back in Penang while she strived hard to qualify herself as an engineer.

Now that both of us are working adults, we're still a bridge apart due to her work commitment.

-sigh-

All these years of long distance relationship gives me a lot of freedom to do what I want in my spare time. Shooting some hoops after work, getting myself chased by dogs while jogging at 6am, pew-pew-pew'ing in StarCraft 2, spamming the F5 key to check for requests to buy games online and so much more that I can't even begin to imagine on what I should be giving up on once we're living under the same roof.

Three years of staying with the same roommate in UUM has indeed taught me a lesson. The two of you may be all close and dandy as friends but once thrown into the same room for years, slowly but surely, old habits will start to rear its ugly heads and it will not take long before each of you has your very own list of yucky-stuffs-my-partner-does that you find them hard to accept or live with.

Guess what? While I'm writing this entry, waifu called and told me that her landlord is moving out soon. Looks like I've just rolled myself a bad number in snakes and ladders. Funny how things coincide against each other when you're still scratching your head pondering on what to do next, eh? :D

So, how well will we cope with sharing a bed, I wonder...

Case study: Distorted interpretation of social media

2010-07-22T02:22:00.011+08:00

I was recently been alerted to a Facebook wall where something interesting just took place.

Interesting? I initially thought that it must be just another set of raunchy photos of some skimpily clad ladies or something similar to that. This is what Facebook is famous for after all... or am I wrong?

So the page loaded and yeah, I was definitely wrong. A quick glimpse on the header showed nothing interesting; it was just an announcement by OffGamers which served to advertise one of their many products...

... except the fact that there were way too many comments for such an ordinary announcement.

Reading through all the comments, I finally managed to figure out what the fuss was all about. Apparently, OffGamers' competitor - MOL - decided to make a not-so-smart-decision by invading and humiliating OffGamers for being a smaller company as compared to MOL.

It's pretty understandable if this Ganesh Kumar Bangah is a stupid new intern in MOL but no, this is the CEO himself WTF?!

As if the courtesy reply from OffGamers was not good enough, MOL's Sales Executive decided to join into the fray.

The more the merrier?

Pretty soon, it was almost like an onslaught, with so-called satisfied MOL customers filling the comments about their bad experience with OffGamers and how everything went oh-so-smooth with MOL.

Both accounts were newly created right after OffGamers's announcement.

Even my illiterate grandmother can easily identify these as dupes... err, if I translate them into Hokkien, of course!

In most circumstances, this kind of situation tend to turn ugly with name-callings and vulgarities thrown here and there but surprisingly, this was not the case here. In fact, there were a few funny comments that were exchanged which almost got me bursting out in laughter.

Gate-crashing = embracing social media HAHAHA~

Someone seriously need to enrol herself (or himself?) into a How-To-Create-Fake-Facebook-Account-101 class.

Let's see if Ija Mohan is as accurate as Paul?

At the time of writing, the amount of comments stand at 104 and I'm not sure if I'll be pursuing it any further after this. Nevertheless, even though I'm not in the position to judge on who is the culprit and who is the victim, kudos to OffGamers for displaying such a respectable level of professionalism in handling this particular awkward scenario.

MOL, you got to troll harder and better in the future.

-sigh-

P.S. You'll have to click on the photos to enlarge them for better reading. :)

Busy-ness

2010-07-15T04:21:00.016+08:00

Phew~ I'm starting to think that 24 hours a day is not enough for me these days. There are so many things to do but so little time... or maybe I'm just a damn good procrastinator after all. :D Anyway, I'm not going to go about on what I did everyday; I'm not writing a daily activity report here.

Do you play MMORPG? Have you played one before? I used to spend quite some time on a number of them since they were free to play. I still remember vividly that I was a Level 25 Rogue in MapleStory when I paid my first visit to the Free Market to get my Stinger. Woah, the amount of stalls being set up by players were overwhelmingly a lot! While browsing in and out of each stalls looking for my desired item, I finally found a Stinger that was way cheaper than the other stalls and immediately seize it. It didn't take me long to figure out that there are always sellers that tagged their items very much lower than market price and from that moment on, I logged into MapleStory just to hunt for bargain items and trade, not to level up. Ahh... the thrills of taking risk in buying an item that may or may not get sold is so succulently sweet but nothing really defeats the satisfaction when you managed to sell items at higher price with the buyers still under the impression that they've scored a big-discounted purchase. Win-win!

Of course, good things don't last forever. Once I realize that all the profit I gained in the game can't be used in the real world, I gave up on MapleStory a few months later.

-sigh-

If you've guessed it, congratulations and yes, in this entry I'll be writing about - for the lack of better term - trading but rest assured that I'm not trying to advertise my products or service here. This is not your Facebook, is it?

I'm pretty sure that it's not just me but these days, I've been tagged here and there by my Facebook friends for all kind of products that range from babies attire to some sexy see through nightgowns WTF?! All these advertisements by my very own friends really got me thinking.

Is this something to be expected when you reach late 20s when out of sudden, all your friends become business-minded enthusiasts?

Or does this has something to do with the fact that the Internet penetration in our country has reached the level where online business is fast picking up as a new business trend?

What about you? If you have yet to start one, what is the factor that is holding you back? Not enough time - like me? Insufficient capital to begin with? Too troublesome and meddlesome? Do allow me to prove you wrong for the Internet is truly an enabler with many potentials as long as you're looking at the right direction.

Gone are the days where you need to look for a suitable shop lot, apply for license, complete the renovation, spend 12 hours daily cooped up inside your little shop - even during days when business is slow - and last but not least, pay taxes. Is this reason good enough to convince you otherwise? Maybe not since the descriptions above are meant for full-time business but I hope that you do realize the differences doing an online business can be compared to this old business model.

Take me for example. I'm currently doing a very small service business helping students or those without credit card to buy their favourite computer games online. In case you don't know, computer games no longer come in CD / DVD form only these days. You can also buy them from digital distribution portals - such as Steam and many others - and once registered to your account, you can download these games on the spot into as many computers as you want as long as you fulfill the EULA. Most of these portals also come along with the gift function, which is extremely (ab)useful to people like me.

So where's the opportunity, you ask? It's easy, I charge my customers RM5 per transaction. Due to the fact that these portals only deal in USD and the bank exchange rate is constantly fluctuating, I have to include a multiplier that is slightly higher than the highest exchange rate for the past few weeks. For example, Mr. A would like to purchase a copy of Plants vs. Zombies ($9.99) and Left 4 Dead 2 ($29.99) each. At the time of writing, the bank exchange rate is 3.23 and I've fixed my service exchange rate at 3.35.

Price to charge Mr. A = [(9.99 + 29.99) * 3.35) + 5 = RM139
My credit card charge = (9.99 + 29.99) * 3.23 = RM129.14
Profit = RM139 - RM129.14 = RM9.86

Even though I only render this service out as a hobby and with the complete awareness that this is not something I can do full-time, keep in mind that I need neither shop lot nor license to start this business. I also don't get taxed for the profit earned and in fact, the risk is very minimal since I don't need to stock up on these games at all. Someone need the games? I just click, click, click in front of my computer and once customers confirmed receipt of requested games, KA CHING! Customers are happy, I am happy, another win-win scenario achieved!

Another online business example that I can give is selling PayPal funds. To make it easier to understand, just imagine PayPal as a virtual debit card that is widely accepted in most websites. Let's take Mr. B as someone who doesn't own a credit card but he would like to buy something that cost him $500 from a US website. Pause here! Rewind back to 6 months ago when the exchange rate was 3.07 and you credited your PayPal account with $500 from your credit card. Back to our current time with bank exchange rate of 3.23, you agreed to sell the $500 PayPal funds to Mr. B.

Price to charge Mr. B = 500 * 3.23 = RM1615
My credit card 6 months ago = 500 * 3.07 = RM1535
Profit = RM1615 - RM1535 = RM80

Again, this is another scenario of you sitting in front of your computer without the need for shop lot, license and tax. This example definitely pose a certain higher level of risk compared to the first since it's almost equivalent to speculating currency rates but hey, it's still something that can bring in extra cash if done right.

Both examples above are not something new but they serve as good mediums to get my message across to you. Whether you're doing it as a hobby - like me - or to pocket yourselves side-income, I think that this will make a good experience and who knows, perhaps it might become a stepping stone to something much bigger in the near future?!

My only request is that you don't spam my Facebook walls with weird advertisements like tiger costumes or pole dancing classes please.

Now in case my customers are reading this entry of mine, I need to write something to dispel the notion that I'm serving them mainly for profit. As narrated above, I got acquainted with trading in a MMORPG and fell in love with the ability to please both my customers and myself in each transaction. It's akin to being an alchemist; armed with passion, I get to transmute a pebble into gold for you. As such, if you find the need to do so, you may compare myself to the other resellers and decide if they'll be able to value you as a customer better than I do. :)

Why am I writing this? Well, good things are meant to be shared, no? :) Moreover, it's not like I'm the one that came up with all these business models in the first place. I'm just a copycat after all.

Come to think of it, maybe it's time I start looking for vacancies for buyer. :D

Thailand 2009: Day # 2

2010-06-05T22:42:00.009+08:00

I almost forgot about the remaining days that I've yet to write on for my Thailand trip until the recent events where we saw Bangkok city being literally transformed into a mini war zone. I'm an outsider hence I won't go into details on which side is the culprit or victim.

One thing that caught my attention though is how they've renovated the Democracy Monument...

... from this...

... to this.

Day 2 saw Chaiwat joining us on our tour. In fact, he reached our hotel pretty late the night before and bunked in Samarn's room. Since he would only be around until evening, we more or less elected him as our unofficial tour guide of the day.

Our first destination was the Golden Mount, a pagoda on top of a hill.

I guess it must be an auspicious day or something special since there were a large number of tourists - comprised mostly of locals - joining us up there as well.

Rows of bells along the way to the top, each clanks signifying a wish comes true... I think so.

Once on top, I noticed that they were holding a donation campaign where devotees get to scribe down their well wishes on a red cloth which will be draped onto the pagoda.

Apart from the donation drive, there were also Buddhist relics on display in the pagoda which might explain the crowds.

The hill itself wasn't very high, but with the addition of a pagoda on top, it was tall enough to afford a scenic panorama over the city.

A mini-replica of the Golden Mount with the aforementioned red cloth.

Since Chaiwat had a timer ticking down, we wasted no time in getting to our second destination, the Vimanmek Mansion Dusit Palace.

Mansion or palace? Make up your mind!

I'm not sure if it has something to do with the latitude of Bangkok city but the weather here was so much sunnier compared back home. :(

Why has the cloud forsaken us?!

With this kind of temperature, we had no choice but to hop onto an idle tuk-tuk to get here.

There was nothing much to see here as we have to pay in order to enter a certain building. Of course, it was pretty normal to charge tourists entrance fees but to forbid us from bringing in our cameras was totally unacceptable.

As a result, we just strolled around the compound and took a few photos here and there, especially on the ridiculous number of different transports that were on display there.

In one corner, we have the Cinderella-style horse carriage.

If you don't like Cinderella, no problem! There are many more types that you can choose from.

No horse? OK, then how about a purple-coloured tuk-tuk.

Purple again? Are these vehicles sponsored by Cadbury or something?

One of the 2 interesting buildings that we can find here was this large greenhouse across the river with no admittance allowed.

The other interesting building would be the air-conditioned toilet.

In such hot weather, it was definitely heaven on earth!

If you were to ask me, I sincerely think that stopping by this world's largest golden teakwood mansion was a waste of time since there was nothing much to see from the perspective of a tourist. No offense intended.

I'm not sure what actually transpired once we exit the gate but we ended up having to walk a few kilometers just to catch a bus to bring us to our next stop. Bad thing was the hellish heat. Good thing was that along the way, we got to pass by a few interesting landmarks.

The smelly Dusit Zoo.

A post to commemorate the water level this area was under in the past.

The King Rama V Equestrian Statue. Till these days, people still pay homage to this late king even after his demise in 1910.

Compared to the one in Penang, the Bangkok plant-watering vehicle looks so much high-tech. :P

It didn't take me long to realize that I've got my expectation wrong as the bus that came for us was of such an old age that even the flooring was made out of wood.

I suddenly found myself back in the Penang 90s' Yellow Bus. :D

After a short lunch where we had the Bangkok's version of chicken rice, we crossed a few roads and CentralWorld - the largest shopping complex in Thailand - stood majestically in front of us. Now, perhaps this is just culture shock to me, but I can't help being peculiar on how Bangkokians - not sure if this is also applicable to the entire Thailand as well - are able to integrate superstitions into their daily life especially with the erection of 2 Hindu shrines in the least expected location - just right in front of CentralWorld.

Pray to Ganesha for career success...

... and Trimurti to bless you with true love.

If you are a girl reading this, I need you to calm down. Bangkok is a shopping heaven, there is no denying that but unfortunately, we didn't really have much chance and time to do so. :(

I thought I've seen it all when I visited the Langkawi Underwater World but apparently Siam Ocean World decided to prove me wrong. Tucked away in the basement levels of Siam Paragon, the Siam Ocean World is so much bigger and allows you to get much closer to the fishes.

An ocean under a shopping complex? O.o"

I'm not going to show you much fishes here since I can't allow them to have much more screentime than me. This is my blog after all. :P

Aquarium that is even deeper than the tallest of us 3.

OK, this was where my confusion set in. They were trying to tell me this freaking dinosaur is a Jurassic fish?

How to tackle complaints on insufficient variety of fishes on display? Get humans to cosplay gigantic fishes!

In the Siam Ocean World, there were a section where they have aquariums made out of normal everyday appliances. I guess it was an attempt to raise awareness on recycling or something similar to that.

Chevrolet Optra that has been filled to the brim with water and has fishes as passengers.

Fancy having a microwaved goldfish as dinner?

Now, before any of you go yapping about animal abuse, these fishes didn't work here for nothing. One of the few benefits that were documented in their contracts was dental care. Let's take this shark as example:

On its first day of inception into Siam Ocean World; misaligned and protruding teeth.

Now; a much more handsome shark!

Hahaha... good joke eh? No?

-sigh-

Fine, let's move on. The Siam Ocean World also boast Thailand's first 4D theatre, though I would advise you to exclude this feature from the entrance package if possible as it was just so-so.

OK OK, I admit that I don't recommend the 4D theatre because they won't let me keep this funky looking 3D glasses. :P

As we came to the end of the Siam Ocean World tour, Chaiwat was running late to catch his trip home so we had to call it a day. Moreover, Bangkok's sky gets dark pretty early due to the different time zone hence we just jumped onto a taxi and nothing much occurred for the rest of the night.

Please remove me

2010-04-28T14:09:00.007+08:00

I'm not sure if this is a trend that only exists within my company or if it's the same elsewhere. Basically, the scenario started when a lost soul forwarded an escalation email to a group mailbox that consists of many unrelated parties. Within a few minutes, all hell broke loose!

Common sense dictates that all you have to do is ignore and delete these unrelated emails since you're aware of the fact that you're not the intended recipient. Easy, right?

Please remove me! Me too! Me three!

But no! This is the very opportunity to make your presence known to all the employees within the company so you MUST reply to all and request that your email address is removed from the list of recipients!

What began as a single email that got itself sent to the wrong mailbox soon became a flurry of spam emails and before you knew it - congratulations - you now have 157 unread emails with the exact same subject line appearing out of nowhere like a virus outbreak.

It doesn't matter what the person below wrote.

Once in a while, a smart alec will take it a step further by replying to all with some small changes to the subject line like Don't reply to all! which ironically does not help the situation even the slightest bit since it's going to get ignored and thanks, that's an extra spam email in my mailbox.

-sigh-

To make this kind of joke when the recipient list includes directors and managers, this guy sure got balls!

*Shift + Delete + Enter*
*Shift + Delete + Enter*
*Shift + Delete + Enter*

3,338 days

2010-04-17T22:18:00.013+08:00

Today marks the three thousand three hundred thirty eighth days since we began our relationship...

... and this was the very first flower bouquet she has ever received from me.

Surprised? Call me cheapskate or tasteless but truth to be told, she doesn't like the fact that flowers will eventually wilt and die. Yeah, I am completely aware of the fact that most girls don't mean what they say...

... but what good are 101 roses if they don't end up with a pair of wedding bands?

I think it's pointless to declare on the obstacles that we have to go through in order to reach this point in time since no relationship will survive long without conflicts.

Legally we're married, but custom wise, I guess we're just engaged.

If you noticed from all the ABCDE entries, I'm the type to take things in stages instead of rushing through them once and for all. After all, I need you guys to save up enough before I start distributing wedding invitations, no? :D

It took me almost three minutes trying to slip the ring onto her finger, only to realize that we've both got the wrong hand. *facepalm*

Ahem... if you still don't get it, here's the harsh version: You can save your breath instead of asking me when I'm going to hold the wedding dinner. It's not going to be anytime soon.

It was our big day, so how come we were not the ones to get to sit? :(

As you can see from the photo above, we only extended invitations to closest family members and friend as we have to keep the crowd to minimum.

Once we were done swearing, it's the Assistant Registrar of Marriage's turn to yada yada yada us into donations. :P

By the way - just for your information - the oath is very much longer if you recite them in English. Do opt for the Chinese version if both you and your partner are able to read Chinese. :)

The latecomers.

Seriously, I've been staring at the monitor for few hours now, not sure on what exactly to write. It's pretty awkward, since I always write stuffs that will eventually end up with -sigh- but for this particular entry, I don't think it's appropriate for me to do so. :P

Mr. and - semi - Mrs. Tan. :)

Blacklisted

2010-03-23T02:08:00.002+08:00

This evening I managed to get hold of a particular someone who has been ignoring my calls and SMSes for the past few years. Unfortunately, I had to use my office telephone to get her to pick up the call and I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be happy or pissed off right now.

So, I'm sure everyone has their very own good friends or old pals whom you actually look forward to meeting up with after years of being apart. I'm not sure if this only happens to friends of opposite genders but it seemed to be so in my case, so don't put me off as being sexist or anything close to that. I actually got two god-sisters who I was pretty close with during my teenage years; let's just call them Norahs and Eneri.

I knew Norahs from my part-time job at Sunshine Square while I was in Form 3 as we were part of the same group of promoters on the same floor. Everything was pretty smooth and in fact, I was glad to be one of her few friends that got personally invited to her wedding, considering how rushed it was back then. Trust was not really an issue since her parents knew me and I didn't hesitate even the slightest bit when she requested for monetary assistance due to her father's failing business. After all, what does RM2,000 meant to a few years of friendship? After she got herself a son, we still - once in a while - keep in contact through SMS and she did mention about returning me the money a couple of times until around a year ago when I stopped receiving any reply from her end.

Did her husband got jealous of our SMS correspondence and stopped her from texting me anymore?

Did she got into an accident or something of that nature?

Or was she ashamed of not being able to return me the money even though I didn't pressure her into doing so?

-sigh-

Compared to Norahs, I was even much fonder of Eneri since I was able to relate to her life experience as a person who struggled through hard times and ended up being successful. Role model would suit her better instead of being a god-sister, I would say. I introduced her to squash and even lent her my beloved first racquet after she complained about the lack of opportunity for her to release stress while she was in university. I was practically walking her path, toiling and digging my way past Form 6 and finally got accepted into a local university. For the 3 years I slacked myself off in Universiti Utara Malaysia, I tried calling her and sent her numerous SMSes, proclaiming my ecstacy of being able to stand at the same level as she did but I guess all of that fell on deaf ears - or blind eyes.

Did she cut off communication with me to avoid incurring her new boyfriend's jealousy?

Did she got into an accident or something of that nature... nahh, that couldn't be. She did pick up my call just now and even though I muted my microphone, hearing her voice going hello hello actually make me kind of relieved. At least she is still around but why the heaven did she decide to ignore all my attempts to get in touch with her all these years?

Or did she accidentally broke my racquet and was ashamed for not being able to find me an exact model as compensation?

What would you do if you're in my shoe? Do I keep reaching out to them, hoping that one day they'll ping me back or should I just delete them from my life? I sincerely believe that they're not the materialistic type of people but that is exactly the very point that got me confused even further; what could have drove them to the extent of shutting me out of their life?

:(

Perspectives

2010-02-23T20:39:00.008+08:00

I think almost everyone has heard about it. It is imminent. The government is mulling a hike in petrol price, this time by 10 cents or so we read. A week or two after they implement this new subsidy decrement - like it or not - we shall be feeling the snowball effect on other commodities such as food and housing property - just to name a few - going up up up as well.

Unfortunately, the only thing that does not comply with the above clip would be my salary.

-sigh-

Anyway, before you misunderstand me any further, this is not an entry about me whining non-stop. Recently I had an enlightening experience which I think can be applied on a bigger scale and I would like to get some opinions if this is truly relevant.

It is about looking at things from different perspectives - be it wider, bigger or from another angle.

I always eat out for lunch. Whenever the waiter comes over to take my drink order, I would usually opt for those iced drinks in the range of plus-minus RM1. I actually prefer plain water, but I have always been under the impression that it is not a wise choice as a glass would cost me 30 cents WTF?! However, me being me, I started a deep dive into this decision-making dilemma and came to a conclusion that plain water is actually the right way to go. Why is it so you ask?

You might disagree or unaware of this but in a normal everyday scenario, we usually take into account how much the kopitiam (coffee shop) gained from each glass of drink we ordered. Let us assume a glass of iced tea with milk as costing us RM1.

Compared to a glass of iced water with tea extract plus a few teaspoons of condensed milk, a glass of plain water sounds so empty, so unrewarding and too easy for the 30 cents that we have fork out for. Hey, that is almost akin to a donation of 30 cents for the kopitiam each time I ordered plain water!

Now, if we shift our attention to the main reason we ordered drinks in the first place and stop giving a damn on how much the kopitiam earned, things would not appear the same anymore. You drink to quench thirst. Whether the drink is sweet, cold or plain, they still serve the same purpose. However, plain water is healthier and cheaper by 70 cents, hence the definition of a clear winner in my opinion.

As you can see, by focusing on things that are advantageous to us instead of others, a simple object like a glass of plain water can be painted in another light.

Of course, focusing entirely on benefiting only yourselves is not always the best choice out there. Back to the topic on fuel price increase, would you pay more for a cleaner and environmentally friendly public transportation such as monorail or choose to drive to work? If you take monorail, your wallet burns but you will be doing yourselves and the people around you a big favour by keeping the air clean... unless you got yourselves molested in the sardine-packed monorail but that is another story altogether. :P

From the two feeble examples I suggested above, we can more or less deduce that most - but not all - decisions that are selfish in nature or do not go through much thought usually revolve around money while anything else would require you to take a step back and do some thinking for them to reveal themselves. Money is evil, eh? On a side note, have you ever realize that economy - like most of the other human inventions - is ultimately one of the main reasons people were being pushed around, me getting stressed out, nations waged wars and humans extincting themselves?

Anyway, sometimes I do find it a little frustrating when I come to a point of realization that a choice which was earlier on deemed as wrong or illogical actually appears to be the best that I should have made. This sort of situation usually manifests itself when you have something at stake, such as having 16 points in Blackjack. Do you hit or stand? :)

If you find me making no sense or whatsoever, blame the heat... or yourselves for looking at this entry from a wrong perspective. :P

Google <3 Islam?

2010-01-19T17:19:00.007+08:00

Try using Google for a day and it should not take you long to realize that the autocomplete feature can sometimes come up with eyebrow-raising results that make you go WTF?! In case you have never heard of it before, it is basically a mechanism that suggests or predicts what are the words or phrases that you are going to type without the need to complete the whole line.

However, recently there has been a big hoo-ha when it was discovered that Google's autocomplete feature somehow favours a certain religion as displayed below. Note that I only tested six religions with the most number of followers.

Christianity is bullshit.

Hinduism is monotheistic.

Buddhism is not a religion.

Sikhism is false.

Judaism is false.

Islam is ?

Go on, give it a try if you are sceptical about these screenshots. Few websites claimed that Google has acknowledged this as a bug but hey, the earliest website that I found to report this issue was written on 17 December 2009; this must be one die hard bug!

-sigh-

Goodbye Mr. Ng Teck Meng

2010-01-15T20:50:00.007+08:00

Today marks the last day of this special colleague of mine in Dell. Of all the types of people I have worked with in the span of 3 years, I have only met his twice - the first was Lee Hin.

Magnificent? Outstanding? Impressive?

Ptui! These flowery words clearly do not do them any justice. Worse still, it would be such an understatement to describe them so.

Teck Meng and his Japanese girl in Malacca. Do let me know if you happen to know her.

His departure really got me to reconsider my decision of staying put in Penang, or at least Dell. Perhaps it is time that I step out from my comfort zone and venture southwards to Cyberjaya? This might sound arrogant but I have literally reached the very last stage - or the most advanced position - a Technical Support Specialist can be. It is a dead-end with nothing new to learn. I have to either change my role, move out or join the queue in waiting for someone from the higher echelon to resign. But why wait when Cyberjaya pays so much? 200% is no small amount and let us be frank, what are the chances that I land myself a position high enough to offer that much in Dell?

-sigh-

Looking back, I find it hard to believe that I first got acquainted with both of them as a Phone Buddy and finally parted with Shell as their next destination. What a coincidence!

In case you are reading, I shall hold back my manly tears and bid you farewell, albeit with a heavy heart. The team will definitely never be the same without your presence here.

I better stop here as I am already running late to your farewell party. In parting, allow me to dedicate you this song to cherish these past few years' worth of companionship we have shared:

Gosh, this entry is full of gayness.

Happy New Year 2010

2010-01-03T22:10:00.011+08:00

Looking at the number of entries I posted up for year 2009, I guess I have to admit that I am pretty much lazier compared to the years before. Hrm... instead of lazier, I believe the right term should be demotivated. Work has been killing my mood off rather efficiently these few months to the extent that if I were a girl, people would have thought that I have been suffering from menstrual pain almost daily for the past months. :D

Most of my friends who took up blogging have been hibernating for some time too. Take a look at the list of links at the right section of my blog interface and tell me, how many of them are still actively writing? Why the lack of update I wonder? Being the only one with new entries is no fun. It is akin to being the only guy talking in a support group while the rest of your peers are dozing off or minding their own businesses. Is writing blog a hobby that requires commitment, which I am sure everyone is short of since the day we elevated our status into the working society? It seemed so to me, hence the inability of me to keep churning out entries after entries as frequent as I hoped to. Of course, that is not the only reason I am such an inconsistent blogger. I have always tried to avoid writing in a casual manner, leaning more towards professionalism with the aim of improving my English vocabulary with each entry. These, coupled with the nature of being a perfectionist usually leads me to a wall of writer's block whenever I failed to coin a suitable term to describe something I had in mind.

So, it is now year 2010 and to be frank, I am not the type to come out with a list of resolutions each time January comes into view. Are you one to do so? Nevertheless, with such a crazy 2009 I had, perhaps it will be of no harm in trying to pen down a few sketchy 2010 resolutions.

While 2008 was a year full of health problems, 2009 did not begin any better. In fact, it was such an emotional turmoil that I would volunteer to go under the knife three more times rather than experiencing the same April again. However, if I were to look at things from an optimist's perspective, this unfortunate event would later on became a catalyst to the birth of ABCDE and subsequently, landed me a fiancée after 101 months of courting.

The second half of year 2009 was much more stable, though still inundated with all sorts of good and bad news. Weekends were the only days where 24 hours are never enough for me. If there was such a thing as a see-saw with 3 ends, then it would be the best representation of a triangle conflict I had been plagued with all year long - 靖璇, weekend overtime and basketball.

-sigh-

Sunday was the only day I get to do sports, particularly basketball but there were times when my basketball buddies suddenly dwindled due to some new activities they were interested in. However, going to basketball means forgoing Sunday overtime and this did not go very well with boss. In fact, he has been using it as an excuse to mentally deduct a few points off my performance review even though I had contributed various accomplishments towards the team. The fact that 靖璇 is working far away from home did not help at all since she would only be available during the weekends as well. As much as I wished to abandon the weekend overtime due to the overwhelming stress, I do realize that it would provide me with much more financial flexibility at the cost of 靖璇 and me gaining a few extra slabs of abdominal fat. :P

Hence, 2009 saw me trying to make a few amendments to balance out these triple commitments. I have given up DotA to spare myself some quality time for evening tele-conversation with 靖璇. Moreover, realizing that there were way too many things that I was trying to be good at, I have trimmed my interests down to a probationary series of three - basketball, go and StarCraft. With the success of my maiden attempt at half-marathon across the Penang Bridge, I might turn to running to compensate for the lack of basketball which will definitely give me much more space to breath during weekends... if only I can get myself to sleep and wake up early to run. :P

For the final two months of 2009, I was swarmed with more than 5 wedding dinners and these would have definitely made a good curtain call if not for the few close friends of mine who ended their long-running relationships.

I have also started looking for a house to call my own. The price of properties on the island have been ballooning and sooner or later, it will be inevitable for me to move across to the mainland for a home that better suits my current salary. I did locate a condominium project that I was interested in but alas, it only proved to be a bitter pill to swallow that no matter how much overtime I made, my monthly income is evidently insufficient to even secure me a house loan of approximately RM250,000.

Bad news aside, I finally had a passport with my name on it. Just like a credit card, I have to keep reminding myself to be prudent with it. Overall, I have only travelled to three locations for year 2009 - Thailand, Kuala Lumpur and Langkawi. Was that considered as too many trips in the span of a year?

Someone once told me that bank passbook is one of the many items you can use to evaluate the way you lived your previous year. I have always brushed it off as a tad too materialistic method but if it was true, then 2009 must have been a massive failure since I almost emptied my savings. Three rings, a personal computer, a secret project - plus one or two more major spending that escaped my mind at the moment - and BAM, almost 90% of my savings were gone!

Since I had a lot of three's mentioned above - knives, hobbies, vacations and rings - I shall make the list of resolutions for year 2010 short, with another set of three's:

registration of marriage
vacation in Singapore
accumulate and maintain a minimum amount of RM10,000 in savings

So what about you? How do you cap off your 2009 and what do you look forward to in 2010?

Penang Bridge International Marathon 2009

2009-11-27T22:57:00.020+08:00

I have talked the talk, it was now time to walk the walk.

With just four sessions of training amounting to a total distance of 27.5km, 22nd of November was finally just a day away. As if the lack of preparation was not bad enough, I found myself stuck in office, being swarmed with telephone calls and escalation emails from 1.30pm all the way to 10.30pm; all these shits while my colleagues were having a good time munching away at our department's annual dinner in the newly opened Hard Rock Hotel Penang.

Since I have to report myself in at Queensbay Mall by 3.15am, I figured that it would be pointless to return home after work, thus opting to take a short two hours worth of uncomfortable nap before my colleague came to pick me up at 2am.

Not even two kilometers out from our office, we saw a man lying on the pavement by the side of the road with his motorcycle in the same state as he was - motionless - five meters away. As he was being tended to by two other motorcyclists, we drove past them and reported the accident to a group of idling traffic policemen, barely 300 meters away from the spot.

Me: Encik, kat belakang sana ada accident. Ada seorang tu terhumban kat tepi jalan.
Traffic policeman: Accident? Ha... biar dia mati la.

If you find it hard to comprehend the Malay conversation above, try the English translation below:

Me: Sir, there was an accident back there. A victim was thrown off his motorcycle and landed on the roadside.
Traffic policeman: Accident? Bah... just let him die.

Wow, somehow I was not surprised to hear him utter those despicable words; he was a civil servant after all and they were meant to make all the right things go wrong. *rolleyes*

Sensing no help from them, we gave up and proceeded to our destination. At the back of my head, I could not help wondering if he would have responded in a better manner if we were a bunch of foreigners instead.

Due to the sheer number of cars been parked haphazardly near Queensbay Mall, we had to leave our car in front of a colleague's house in the Pantai Jerejak residential area. From a distance away, we could feel the carnival-like atmosphere with music booming loud in the background and rows of tent being erected, each distributing freebies that were more or less related to the marathon.

With less than ten minutes to go, I dunked three bananas into my mouth and did a series of minor warm up, only to realize that I have not drank even a single drop of water since I woke up. With no time to hesitate any further, I picked up an unfinished water bottle that had been left on the roadside and took a few full gulps. Sounds familiar?

I think there was no gun off or maybe I was too far at the back to hear it as I did not even realize that the half-marathon runners have been flagged off - we were just following the crowd, walking forward, presuming that we were being led to the starting line - until I saw our Penang Chief Minister, YAB Lim Guan Eng waving to us from the side of the road.

To have the Chief Minister up at this ungodly hours, I must say that I am very impressed!

I joined this race with two objectives in mind:

complete the half-marathon in less than three hours
do not stop running until I reach the finishing line

Forking out RM40 to torture myself for 21km. What has this world comes to?

Based on the time I clocked during training sessions - 5.5km in 40 minutes - I should be able to survive the whole ordeal if I did not overexert myself along the way. In fact, I started out so slow that it took me 25 minutes to reach the very same point that the women category runners hit in 10 minutes!

-sigh-

I spent most of my time looking down at my own two feet alternating between each another - pulling me a step forward at a time - to avoid myself from subconsciously following the pace of other runners. However, once in a while when I looked up, I bore witness to many things that I did not get to experience in my normal everyday life.

The new marathon statues along the coastal highway.

For example, I saw a man with deformed right leg, limping his way along with other runners, undeterred by the number of runners that zoomed by past him early in the race. Meanwhile, RUNWITME managed to capture a funny video of this firing squad which I had totally missed.

Since this is the only once-in-a-year opportunity to set foot on the Penang Bridge, I truly enjoyed my run along the whole stretch with the strong sea-breeze flowing through my hair. Apart from the various stations providing drinking water, 100 Plus, banana and iced sponge, the organizer even set up a group of drummers at the middle span of the bridge to pump the runners on.

100 Plus stations were usually the crowd favourite hence I only grabbed drinking water for a few gulps before throwing the bottles to the side of the road; another once-in-a-year event where littering is tolerated.

I managed to maintain my speed until the 15km mark when my right leg joints started to feel loose but they were not bad enough to warrant a stop or walk. After doing the U-turn at E-Gate, I started overtaking other runners to motivate myself further by imagining that for every runner that I overtook, I got to absorb a small portion of their energy to push myself on and no, it was not a joke.

2 hours and 45 minutes later, I stomped my right foot - where the Championchip was tied to - on the finishing line mat to mark the end of my 21.0975km non-stop run.

My only gripe was the long queue at the finishing line due to the medals and lucky draw coupons being distributed too near to the front. Relocating them a little further to the back should do the trick.

My colleagues and friends that ran along with me in the same category.

MISSIONS ACCOMPLISHED!

Full marathon next year, anyone?

Thailand 2009: Day # 1

2009-11-20T22:51:00.022+08:00

Phew, the Penang Bridge International Marathon is just a few days away and I have been dedicating most of my free time to get myself in shape for this special event so do pardon me for the lack of update in this blog.

I am somewhat sceptical about the above claim.

Anyway, if you still remember the hardship that I had to go through to get my passport done, I finally get to put it to good use by tagging along with my colleagues for a six days trip to Thailand. Call me an idiot but due to the various worries I had in my head prior to the trip - influenza A (H1N1) pandemic, political instability in Thailand and first aeroplane flight in my life - I have to calm myself down by handing over my treasure key to my girlfriend for safekeeping.

The key to priceless treasures.

I left my motorcycle in Alan's house and his father fetched us to the airport where we held our rendezvous with our Thai colleague, Samarn. Nothing much to describe here except for the fact that our flight FD 3542 was delayed by around 20 minutes. As this was my first time on an aeroplane, I was pining hope to get the window seat but alas, I was assigned to the seat next to it. This was a Thai AirAsia flight, so I more or less ignored all the in-flight announcements as I had a hard time making out their English that was laden with Thai accent.

Around one and a half hours later, we touched down on the Suvarnabhumi Airport and it instantly became the very first landmark in Thailand that I fell in love with. Even though our aeroplane did not have the privilege to drop its passengers off into a gangway that is directly connected to the airport terminal building, they have buses waiting to transport us there.

I love the design of the see-through elevator!

The Suvarnabhumi airport terminal is such a humongous building that we had to grab a copy of the free airport maps to prevent ourselves from walking in circles!

The departure floor's row F, G, H, J, K and L. This goes on until row W.

I bet the garden itself is even larger than the Penang International Airport building.

Our first mission was to hunt for lunch and after getting ourselves slightly lost, it did not take us long to gobble down all the food.

S&P's yummy deep-fried pork spare ribs.

Ten minutes later. *burp*

We did a minor tour around the airport while looking for a way out. Trust me, as a stranger in a massive four-storey building with glass doors on all floors, you would be under the impression that certain doors are meant to be entrances only and if you were to take a step out of those entrance doors, an ear-deafening alarm would be triggered with the airport security personnel popping out of nowhere like ninjas, ready to stuff you into a wooden crate and deport your sorry ass back to your country of origin for flouting even the slightest law there (longest sentence ever!)... well, something like that. :P

Mess with us and we will suffocate you with an extra large plastic bag!

Once you are out from the airport terminal building, there are various forms of transportation that you can take to get yourself around Thailand such as public taxi, airport limousine, the Airport Express bus and if you are really up to the challenge, walk.

We hopped on the free shuttle bus which brought us to the nearby bus terminal.

Five minutes later, we were in another bus, on our way to our hotel near Khaosan Road.

Samarn booked us a standard double room each in Sawasdee Khaosan Inn. The room rate for a standard single room was almost the same hence he felt it much wiser to opt for the standard double room instead.

No you perverted basket, I did not bring back any special friend to share the queen-sized bed with me.

However, if you are itching to call for one, there is a box of condoms on the refrigerator for your convenience.

Half an hour after checking in, we found ourselves in a pink-coloured taxi, on our way to the Chatuchak market. Public transport in Thailand is very efficient, a far cry from the situation we have in Malaysia. Not only do the taxis here run on meter with reasonable fare, they come in so many colours that I would have mistaken them as M&M's candies if I were without my glasses.

Samarn claimed that the colours are part of the Thai government's proposal to make the traffic jam looks less stressful. No joke!

Chatuchak market, the human version of Bangkok's worst traffic jam.

We initially just strolled along the market's parameter as it is wider compared to the alleys in the market itself. Just like our local markets, there were no escaping beggars but the stark difference is that the Chatuchak beggars do not just sit there with hands held high nor do they bug you. Some - especially the elderly and visually-impaireds - sang karaoke with a speaker hung around their necks while doing their rounds.

The younger generation would usually try something eye-catching, like performing freestyle football in such a cramped space.

I also noticed a group of students in uniform - presumably members of their school band - playing a wide variety of music with an open violin case filled with coins placed in front. I could not help but to wonder if such freedom would ever be granted to our students back home. In my opinion, I find nothing wrong with showcasing your ability in public and earning a little pocket money along the way as long as it does not hamper your higher priorities. Haha... who am I kidding to think that our government would endorse such a talent building initiative? Not only would the pupil be subjected to suspension from school, non-governmental organizations would intervene and sue the parents' asses off on charges of child exploitation and abuse. Malaysia BOLEH!

This guy went to the extent of dressing up as a cyborg just to distribute pamphlets.

We attempted to navigate ourselves into the narrow alleys but did not last long, no thanks to the crowd and the cloudless sky did not make the situation any better.

When all hope seemed lost, this coconut ice cream came to our rescue. It was so good that I could not help salivating whenever I heard the name Chatuchak being mentioned.

We spent quite some time on our dinner as the dishes were way too spicy but they were definitely good. By the time we returned to our rooms, it was already dark even though the clock just stroke 6.30pm. After cleaning ourselves up, it was time to hit the party at Khaosan Road, where the whole stretch of road would be closed to vehicles in the evening.

Based on the amount of neon signs, you can more or less guess how long this road goes.

Khaosan Road was flanked on both sides by cheap hotels, pubs, massage parlours and convenience stores. Talking about convenience stores, I find it hilarious that there were three 7-Eleven stores on the same road itself. Either the business must be pretty darned good or there was a big fail in the business planning stage.

You can find a lot of mini stalls selling all sort of delicacies ranging from simple fried noodles to exotic deep-fried scorpions.

It was the 31st of October, hence Halloween party was in full force.

I guess this must be where our politicians obtained their fake degrees.

The biggest signboard in Khaosan Road for a product that I never get to use. *blush*

After a few hours of eye-washing, we headed back to our rooms with a few bottles of beer, worms and scorpion, ready to 干杯 away my first night in a foreign land... only to have Alan fell asleep with all the snacks locked along inside his room.

-sigh-

The scorpion who died in vain. T_T

The Lord - and Lady - of the Rings

2009-10-17T23:30:00.002+08:00

∞

P.S. Another Blog Comments Disabled Entry.

Running out of time breath

2009-10-16T21:52:00.006+08:00

It was 2.45am in the ungodly hour and I was still tossing about in my bed, trying to get some decent sleep. To think that I was supposed to wake up at 5.45am for my half-marathon training, I could not help but to wonder if I would be able to make it to work on time at 11am.

Yeah, it was limitation all over again. :P The only difference is that this time, I have registered myself instead of just stopping at planning to do so.

Many of us might not know about this but Milo does contain caffeine, though in a smaller amount compared to coffee. It was certainly a mistake of mine to have a cup as supper which resulted in the owl-like awareness during bedtime. I was so wide awake that I actually decided to just expedite the jogging schedule to 3am if I still failed to fall asleep by then.

By 5.15am, I was wide awake again. Sensing no point in trying to gain myself another half an hour's rest, I got myself geared up and hit the 5.5km path that I had plotted a day earlier. The aim was to make two rounds, which is equivalent to around 11km.

You may want to view the larger map to save your eyesight.

I usually hit the jogging path along the Air Itam dam as the air there is much cleaner but it was too far away for - almost - daily practice.

Unfortunately, while drafting this new route, I failed to take into consideration the terrace houses along the road. Dogs barked non-stop even from a distance away and if any of these gates were not locked properly, it would be my LIFE that I am running for, instead of this silly marathon.

The previous night's Milo-drenched breads did not help much as it aggravated my IBS (irritable bowel syndrome), which in turn caused my mouth and anus to burp non-stop all the way.

It was not until the 3.2km mark that I made my first stop due to my left shoe's undone shoelace. It was at this point in time that the progress started going downhill. Bending down to tie the shoelace proved to be a grave mistake as I started to experience dizziness with the butterflies in my stomach threatening to throw all its contents out my mouth. Now that I recall it, I find it funny how my mouth had to start multitasking:

gasping for air
taking over my nose's task of exhaling carbon dioxide
belching out the air trapped in my stomach
yawning
getting itself ready to puke

A few hundred meters of slow walk later, my condition improved a little and I managed to switch to the running gear again.

Jogging along main roads has its pros and cons. Main roads are usually brighter and you do not need to fear for any up-to-no-good stranger lurking around in dark corners. However, you will have to compromise on the air quality due to the higher frequency of vehicles compared to those smaller roads. Imagine yourself fighting for air to land another foot forward when out of no where, an old bus leaves you enveloped in a cloud of black, smelly smoke in its wake. That was so demoralizing that I almost took the shortest route home while questioning my earlier self on the need to torment myself over this RM40 race.

I broke down again - temporarily - at the 4.6km mark due to the recurring nauseatic sensation before pushing myself home to complete the 5.5km.

36 minutes 16 seconds.

My initial goal was to complete 10km in an hour. To fail that is bad but to spend so much time just for 5.5km, that is bad bad bad! Compared to the yesteryears, my stamina is clearly fizzling away. Is this a sign of age catching up?

-sigh-

I sincerely hope that this failure will not linger on. To quote Mr. Fail-A-Lot, Thomas Edison:

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

Good luck to myself on my next attempt, scheduled to be on this coming Tuesday.

Jangan marah ya?

2009-10-05T19:53:00.010+08:00

Incompetent. That is the only word that I can think of - at this very moment - that best describes the Immigration Department of Malaysia, Georgetown branch.

I had prepared all the necessary documents for a new passport as indicated in the official website and taking into consideration the worst case scenario, I had also intentionally booked myself an annual leave today just to make sure that I do not have to stress myself crazy over appearing late for work. After all, everyone is pretty well aware of the ~~speed~~ slowness those government staffs usually go about with their work.

Apparently, the worst case scenario that I got myself ready for was not exactly the worst. Tell me, how do you label a scenario that is much worse than the worst case scenario itself?

I reached the department at 9.20am and discovered that I need to have a photocopy of my MyKad.

Me: Can you help me to print a copy with one of the internal photocopy machines that you guys have?
Officer: No.

Me: Can I have a ticket number first while I get to the nearest shop with photocopy machine?
Officer: No.

Fine! The nearest shop with photocopy machine was congested and it took me 40 minutes to get back to the department again. I was given a ticket with number 1176 and the current number in the queue was 1060 WTF?! There were 116 applications to go and yet, they refused to give me a number before I went off to get myself a photocopy of my MyKad?

There were six counters to receive applications but it was not until 2.30pm that 1176 was finally announced. One look at my passport photos and the Indian lady told me that my hair covered too much of my temple WTF?! After more than five hours of waiting with no lunch nor a sip of water, this is the best excuse she could come up with to reject my application? With the amount of crowd in the building lingering about, she agreed to put my application on hold while I went to get another two copies of valid passport photo.

It was raining cats and dogs but 20 minutes later, I came back to the counter with two new pieces of passport photos, albeit very much uglier compared to the one that I took a day earlier. My MyKad photo was so bad that it had become a constant jokes among my friends so the last thing I wanted was a passport with exact ugly photo but after getting myself trapped in the sardine-packed building with my stomach growling non-stop, I did not give it a damn anymore as long as they handover me a new passport.

I told the Indian lady that I wanted to make a five-year passport which is equivalent to RM300. After three digital thumbprint scannings and an old-fashioned thumbprint with ink pad on the document, I was asked to wait for my name to be called for payment. True enough, my name was announced and this time, it was a Malay lady who demanded for RM100.

RM100? I told her that it was meant to be RM300 but she replied that I applied for a two-year passport. Again, I was told to take a seat while she sorted it out with the Indian lady.

It was 3.20pm when the Indian lady beckoned me to come over to her counter. Somehow or rather, she accidentally filled me up for a two-year passport in the digital application form and I have to go through another round of digital thumbprint scannings. Another sila duduk dulu as she claimed that she has to wait for her boss to approve these changes.

3.40pm and her boss finally came back - from his tea break I guess - and with a few looks on my document on his table, he called for the Indian lady again. The rain which had stopped pouring earlier came crashing again, as if dancing to the rhythm of my mood. After a chat or two, the Indian lady requested for me to attend to her counter again. Three thumbprint scannings again and sensing my dark, clouded face, she still had the audacity to utter a line of jangan marah ya?

MARAH?! BENCI ada la KNNMCB! was what I almost blurted out. After shoving the RM300 to the Malay lady, I was finally told that they would no longer be able to process my application by today, which literally means that I shall have to make myself present tomorrow to collect the passport WTF?!

At that very moment, I was so pissed off that responding her with f*ck you was no longer a vulgarity but a compliment instead.

As a result, I have to give my manager a call to apply for another day of annual leave. To sum it all up, I achieved totally nothing today but wasted the following:

nearly 7 hours caged in a narrow building with malfunctioning air-conditioners
skipped my lunch
missed my opportunity to cancel my UOB credit card
wasted 2 days of annual leave
failed to set up a meeting with my insurance agent

I wonder if this is part of Najib's 1Malaysia, where rakyat didahulukan, pencapaian diutamakan (people first, performance now). Gee, if that is the case, thanks, but no thanks then.

-sigh-

I sincerely hope that this was an exceptional case... or have I just stumbled upon the same type of cancer that Y.B. Jeff mentioned in his blog not very long ago?

15Malaysia

2009-09-23T09:43:00.006+08:00

Thanks to Najib's 1Malaysia, numbers associated with the word Malaysia have appeared to be the most popular catchphrase in the country these days. Enter 15Malaysia, a short film project sponsored by P1 which showcases fifteen video clips that touch on all aspects of Malaysian life.

Among the fifteen, I like Slovak Sling the most. The cheeky conversation between Patrick Teoh and Harith Iskander made me burst out laughing with tears the first time I watched the video clip.

With the recent uproar of celebrities' naked photos and videos leaked on the Internet, I guess Lesson 38 is something that everyone has to bear in mind all the time.

-sigh-

The remaining few that caught my attention are as displayed below.

The Tree is an eye-opening video clip that reveals the importance of planting trees from the perspective of a Muslim.

House reminds me of the recent Kampung Buah Pala fracas in Penang where the previous state government has somehow sold a land of substantial size that belonged to a group of Indian families for development.

One Future is an inspiring piece which narrates the birth of opposition and rejection in a flawed system that was deemed as perfect... at least, that was what I perceived it to be. :P

Meter is interesting as the principal cast who was lambasting about the current political woes is no other than the controversial politician himself, Khairy Jamaluddin. This video clip convinced me that he has potential as an actor should he decides to quit his political career one day.

Most of these short films have hidden meanings in them and it is up to the viewers on how to interpret these invisible agendas; something that the late Yasmin Ahmad used to portray in her Petronas festival commercials.

Meme: Save Yvonne's sight

2009-09-15T22:21:00.009+08:00

I do not usually post entries looking for help. In fact, the last time I did the exact same thing was for baby Kai Xin, where I actually created a special iConUnot section on the side panel to link visitors there.

Let us face it. I am no Kenny Sia with skyrocketing number of visitors and I do not even know how many of you actually responded to baby Kai Xin's plight in the past. I somehow stumbled upon this request in Patrick Teoh's blog and thought, Well, I shall just do my small part here and whether the rest will follow up - or not - is another story altogether. The extract below is more or less a carbon copy of Patrick's.

Yvonne Foong has been raising funds for the operations she needs to treat her neurofibromatosis which causes tumours to grow inside her body.

Yvonne had already lost her hearing and communicated through writing on a small white board. But now she is losing her eyesight and needs another operation again. The operation is due in December and once again she needs to raise funds for it. The cost of the surgery is USD44,000 (RM154,770) and the cost of her hospital stay for two weeks is USD915 or RM3,219.

She has already raised RM10,000 of this but obviously still has a long way to go. She is hoping to raise the rest by republishing her book I'm Not Sick, Just A Little Bit Unwell in English and Chinese. The books are now available in Malaysian bookshops and from her website store. She is also selling T-shirts at bazaars and via her website store. You can read about her surgery and donate to her fund here.

You can also help by sending on this meme. If you do, please follow these meme rules:

Create a blog entry titled Meme: Save Yvonne's Sight.
List three things you love to see. Add in the picture of Yvonne's book cover. The URL is http://www.yvonnefoong.com/images/banner/my-story.jpg.
End with the line, Yvonne Foong is in danger of losing her eyesight thanks to neurofibromatosis (NF). Please find out how you can help her by visiting her blog at http://www.yvonnefoong.com.
Tag 5 blog friends. Be sure to copy the rules, OK?
If you have a Facebook account, please check out Ellen's new invention, a "feme" pronounced FEEM, a meme designed for Facebook here. And if you want to blog about NF, that would be great too!

The three things I love to see are:

Everything.
Something.
Anything.

I am tagging the following blogger friends to ask them to help out:

Anyone else interested in passing on this meme is more than welcome to do so. I am sure Yvonne will much appreciate it!

Yvonne Foong is in danger of losing her eyesight to neurofibromatosis (NF). Please find out how you can help her by visiting her blog at http://www.yvonnefoong.com.

District 9

2009-08-25T19:53:00.002+08:00

Do not let such an uninspiring title fools you, for this movie will definitely put you on the edge of your cinema seat if you allowed it to. Forget about the toilet, just make sure your eyes are glued to the screen all the time. Girlfriend talking to you? Ignore her or - better still - leave her out of the cinema if she is the type that cannot keep her mouth shut while watching movies.

Touted as one of the best movies this year, District 9 is based on the true events surrounding District Six in the past. If you paid attention to your History teacher, you should be pretty familiar with the term apartheid and this movie is a perfect reminder that even after more than a decade since the death of the infamous social segregation, discrimination remains a demon that cannot be easily exorcised from every human being's soul - including those who were once being discriminated upon.

Unlike the other typical movies these days where there is a fine line between good and evil, District 9 will have almost none of that. What were deemed to be the right decisions or things to do in the beginning will not appear to be so when the movie plot starts to unravel itself. I was able to sympathise with the struggle that the prawns have to go through even though they appeared disgusting the first time they came on screen. In a way, this movie managed to successfully reflect the true nature of humanity, which is not entirely all about sunshine and roses.

NON-HUMANS BANNED!

With a mere $30 million budget, this movie has managed to surpass and put Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen ($200 million) and G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra ($175 million) to shame. While some may brand this movie as Cloverfield 2 - especially with the trademark camera shaking and documentary-like footage - I would say that District 9 has a much more human touch to it where viewers would be able to identify with the protagonist, Wikus van de Merwe's ever-changing morality.

Paving The Way To Unity.

The only complain I have is the quality of censorship that was practiced by the Film Censorship Board of Malaysia. Though they did not beep the mass f*cks - suspected to be due to the South African accent which pronounced the word as fock - cutting off scenes of some Nigerians cannibalising the prawns does not prove a single point at all when there were blood and amputated limbs splattered all over the place throughout the movie. Since the movie events took place in Johannesburg, the English was very easy to comprehend so tell me, WTF is the purpose of having large Malay subtitle that covers half of the screen for?

-sigh-

I shall not be surprised if one day, we find ourselves travelling to some nearby countries with reasonable censorship and logical subtitle font size just to watch a decent movie with not much interruption.

The ending is not something that everyone will take a liking to for the movie leaves it to your own interpretation especially when it comes to Wikus' fate three years down the road. I see this as a clever decision on the director's side since he can always use this opportunity to start a District 10...

... or perhaps stop with this perfect ending and never have Christopher Johnson come back again.

Throw me a friendly stone

2009-08-15T03:43:00.008+08:00

Mention Penang to your friends - especially those that are not Penangites - and two things will generally come to their minds; food and island. Cannot blame them I guess, since most of the hype about Penang's salivating hawker's cuisine are focused to those on the island itself... and do not even get me started on friends who were under the impression that Seberang Perai is a province under the Kedah Darul Aman state *facepalm*

Unfortunately, the same cannot be applied for Penangites who reside on the island. After years of gobbling down the same food, over and over again, our taste buds have grown numb. I cannot help rolling my eyes whenever I have enthusiastic friends from other states asking for my recommendations on what are the must-eats whenever they come over for short holidays.

Gurney Drive hawker centre? Lorong Selamat char koay teow? Bah, all these famous food stalls are nothing but overrated due to some cheap publicity they garnered when the state was trying to promote Penang as a food haven. While non-locals throng these food joints like crows to carcasses, we Penangites are always on the hunt for authentic, succulent, traditionally-passed-down-secret-recipe food stalls that have somehow remained hidden from public eyes all these while.

-sigh-

Okay, I might be exaggerating, but the point is, all that is gold does not glitter. It is not always necessary to cross the Penang Bridge over to the island side in order for you to enjoy a good meal. Last Sunday, I tagged along with a few colleagues to Seberang Perai for dinner and since Alan took his DSLR there, I shall take advantage of his photos to make glimpsing much more convenient for those who are lazy - but faithful - to read; you know who you are. :P

Our destination was Ah Yan Seafood Restaurant in Batu Kawan, somewhere near Bukit Tambun. We ordered ten dishes but the photographer did not manage to snap a photo on all of them as his mouth had intermittently taken control over his hands after the third dish was served.

Fried noodle to warm up our growling stomachs.

Spicy balitong to improve your kissing skill.

Calamari tentacles.

Edible frogs pronounced as water chicken in Hokkien.

Lala-chais and lala-muis.

Cut the CRABs!

Barry demonstrating methods to ~~masturbate penis~~ easily peel off the mantis shrimp's shell.

Three innocent souls having a hard time mast... removing the mantis shrimps' shell.

FORKing fried ice creams.

Altough I would not rate all the dishes 10 out of 10, I would still recommend this restaurant since the price was pretty affordable. As we were done with our dinner pretty fast and early, we decided to hit Wai Sek Gai in Chai Leng Park for a few bowls of Chinese dessert (糖水).

Spot the odd one out.

There are many food stalls here with lots of variety to choose from. If you think Gurney Drive hawker centre is heaven, then I guess Wai Sek Gai must be heaven's rooftop... unless you are the type that require lala-chais with bombastic hairstyle or lala-muis in revealing dress to gawk at in between each bite.

I do not intend to turn this into a food blog so I shall stop here before I get myself hungry at this ungodly hour.

Langkawi island 2009

2009-07-31T23:26:00.018+08:00

I have just returned from a two days' trip to Langkawi island with 靖璇 last Sunday and I thought that it will be helpful to write an entry on my itinerary in case any of you are interested to travel there but in the dark on what to do and where to go. However, before you proceed on, keep in mind that Langkawi island is NOT a place where you can expect:

sandy-white beaches with coconut trees swaying in the wind
crystal-clear sea with colourful fishes swimming in schools
beautiful historical landmarks (*cough cough* Padang Beras Terbakar *cough cough*)

To be frank, the only actual reason I decided to visit Langkawi island again after a bad first impression is the cable car ride. Heck, if it was even the slightest bit plausible, I would have opted to sail there in the morning, accomplish my objective and sail home again before the sun sets. Unfortunately, that will require me to rush around, which is counterproductive to what I was trying to achieve there.

There are two modes of transport that you can take to reach Langkawi island in one piece; ferry or flight. The ferry service is available from Penang island, Kedah and Perlis while I have no idea about flying there. If you are planning to go there in a small group of two to four, the ferry ticket - which can be purchased online - is the only thing that you need to worry about, though I would advise you to book yourself a hotel room as backup. A two-way ferry ticket from Penang island will cost you RM115 and approximately six hours of your lifetime with a few options on the departure time; 8.15am or 8.30am from Penang island and 2.30pm or 5.15pm from Langkawi island.

Super Fast Ferry Ventures' ferry is not-so-fast in reality. :P

If you have no one to drive you to the pier, you can have your car taken care of at the open parking lot near the Fort Cornwallis with a price tag of RM18 for every 24 hours. The security there is pretty good as I accidentally left my car overnight with the driver's window winded down but nothing was stolen.

Spending all three hours cooped up inside the wobbling ferry will do you no good so do take some time off to enjoy the gushing sea breeze on the open-air platform at the back of the ferry.

Once you arrive at the Kuah jetty, be prepared to get ambushed by aggressive illegal car rental agents offering you all kind of packages which might include hotel rooms as well. If you did not reserve any prior to departing and wanted to save the hassle of hunting around for available rooms, you may want to consider these unscrupulous agents' offer.

Do take note that somewhere in the Kuah jetty building, there is a booth distributing free Langkawi island maps that are bundled along with advertisement brochures. Forget about GPS for these maps are all you need to navigate your way all over Langkawi island. Even a person with horrible sense of direction like 靖璇 has no problem guiding me around... though we did a few U-turns as the maps were not exactly perfect. :)

We rented ourselves a white Perodua Kelisa for 24 hours from a legitimate car rental booth located just behind the KFC shoplot, at the cost of RM50 with another RM50 as deposit. Imagine my horror when I discovered that it was a manual transmission car, for the last time I drove one was almost four years ago! Taking this into consideration, you may want to request for a catalogue of much more high-end cars as they are usually the semi-automatic transmission type.

These rented cars are more often than not handed over to you with the fuel gauge hitting rock bottom, hence the very first venue that you have to drive to will most probably be the gas station, with the nearest somewhere in Kuah town. As we were strangers in Langkawi island, we foolishly fed the car RM30 worth of fuel, only to realize by the night that RM15 would have sufficed. :(

Most of the hotels in Langkawi island practise check-in time at 3pm so we decided to have our lunch in one of the many kopitiams in Kuah town. Although Langkawi island is famous for being the shopping paradise for duty-free goods, the same cannot be applied to the price of food there. Reading up on reviews on available restaurants near your hotel is strongly advised if you value good food with reasonable price.

Alcoholics and chocoholics can also take this opportunity to stock up on their much-needed resources for there is not much point to come back here again. I got myself a big can of Asahi beer plus an extra small whisky bottle of Jack Daniel's and Chivas Regal each.

Vacation-thwarting clouds.

With the sky looming dark, we rushed back to the Kuah jetty area to visit the Dataran Lang (Eagle Square) since it was just nearby. By the time the clock ticked 2pm, we made our way from the bottom right corner of Langkawi island to the Awana Porto Malai Resort - that I had reserved a week earlier for RM248 - with a buffer time of one hour in the event we got lost along the way.

Langkawi island's very own Statue of ~~Liberty~~ Eagle.

Dataran Bunga Raya (Hibiscus Square) is located just on the other side of Dataran Lang.

Due to the hotel's location at the bottom left corner of Langkawi island, I had more or less calculated the time required for travel to a selected few places for the day. The hotel is three storeys high but consists of five interconnected blocks with the room assigned to us located on the first floor, first room of the last block. You should see the puzzled look on our faces while searching for our room, one block after another. Strange enough, the receptionist requested for a deposit of RM100 even though I had completed the full transaction through the Internet.

Four more blocks to go. :S

Our next destination?

We took a minor rest to unpack our belongings before heading out to the Oriental Village where the cable car base station is located at. I did try to give the cable car station a few calls - +604 959 4225 - to confirm that they were operating as the sky was terribly cloudy but no one picked them up. As luck has it, the sky cleared up a bit by the time we reached the top left corner of Langkawi island. Do remember to produce your MyKad at the ticket counter as this will allow you to purchase the two-way ticket at a lower price of RM15 per passenger.

The Oriental Village entrance.

The cable car is not the only attraction in the Oriental Village.

Our RM15 credit card.

I am not a fan of height so no point describing the experience of going up the Gunung Machinchang, though I must admit that the Telaga Tujuh (Seven Wells) waterfall that came into sight along the way was pretty eye-catching. It goes without saying that the scenery from the top of Gunung Machinchang was simply breathtaking, provided that there are not much clouds to obstruct your view of the landscapes below. I actually witnessed a number of visitors - particularly those from the Middle East - who took the cable car up, only to make an immediate U-turn back to the base station without coming out which left me scratching my head in disbelief.

"Oh shit, we are PLUMMETING!"

Telaga Tujuh waterfall.

Langkawi International Airport's wave breaker and Pantai Kok islands.

Telaga Harbour Park and Pantai Kok.

Over here, you have two viewing platforms that you can climb up to but they are nothing compared to the curved suspension bridge. Walking along the swaying pathway, I could not help visualizing the scenario of the bridge collapsing all the way into the deep valley below. Every time something hit my toes, I would quickly check inside my bag to ensure that nothing - especially the ingredient - was lost. If it was not for the crowd, I reckon that this would be a suitable altitude for me to initiate my barbeque session.

On top of the ~~world~~ viewing platform.

Langkawi island's biggest smile from the sky.

At this height, even leaning on the railing will not give you any slight sense of security.

If I draw out from my bag an extra big pair of scissors, will the crowd leave us alone?

After some sightseeing, we decided to go down and this was when my heart started beating like a war drum. We waited and waited for the crowd to dissipate in order to have a cable car of our own but those idiots who refused to come out really make me felt like kicking them down the mountain since they were the main reason why the crowd kept building up. After more than 30 minutes of hanging around, we managed to spot an empty cable car which we wasted no time in jumping in... only to have an European couple bursting in before the door could close completely.

超级白!

超级白!

超级白!

Gone! Poof! This was the very reason why I came all the way to Langkawi island and thanks to these two ang-mohs who appeared out of nowhere, a few months worth of preparation disappeared into the thin mountain air.

-sigh-

I was literally sulking all the way down to the base station and by then, it was already almost 6pm. Our next destination was the Underwater World but we decided to postpone it to the next day to avoid unnecessary rush and instead headed east towards the Pantai Pasir Hitam (Black Sand Beach) which was highly recommended by 靖璇's twin sister. In my mind, I was fantasizing about how a beach with black smooth sand and a sunset as background could compensate for the disappointment I had in the cable car earlier. What greeted me later was a smelly, dirty, quiet beach with nothing to see except for a few pipes coughing up food wastes from the adjacent hawker food stalls.

Not-so-black sands.

In case you do not understand, avoid Pantai Pasir Hitam at all costs!

"One small bottle of Cactus mineral water, please."

With the sun halfway down the horizon, we agreed to call it a day and set out for dinner. I did a search on the Internet prior to the trip and a found a lot of thumbs up for Cactus Restaurant, which was conveniently situated at Pantai Tengah - same area as our hotel. The restaurant is a very-down-to-earth type with no air-conditioner and I noticed that a lot of foreigners like to dine there with a number of them having scribbled their testimonials on the ceiling in the past. The waiters there are not only very friendly but multilingual as well with great varieties of tasty food to boot. After an hour or so, we retreated back to our hotel room in jolly good mood with full stomach.

Fancy having your meal under a chalk graffiti'd ceiling?

Instead of beach, Awana Porto Malai Resort has an elevated wooden platform constructed between the hotel and the crashing waves. Although it was quite nice to have a stroll on, my only gripe is that it was a tad too quiet during the night, almost bordering on seclusion. After surveying around and with the day - 25th has always been particularly memorable to the both of us - coming to an end, I have no choice but to pop the long-awaited question under a starless sky with the ingredient laid bare in front of 靖璇's eyes. I did not attempt the traditional down on one knee position as there were people close-by or I would risk her running away due to embarrassment.

Awana Porto Malai Resort's very own backyard.

We spent the rest of the night watching the English-dubbed Kung Fu Hustle that was broadcast on the Vision Four channel, testing the alcoholic beverage that I bought in Kuah town - none tasted good - and played a few rounds of card game before we hit the bed. A word of advice is to shop for a pack of ice or two - if you need them - from the convenient stores along the road as the hotel may charge you an exorbitant bill for one.

My preciousss... ingredient!

嫁给我吗?

And no you perverts, nothing intimate happened in the course of the night. :P

The next morning, we had our complimentary breakfast before checking out at 11am for the Underwater World, a mere 10 minutes drive away. Similar to the cable car ride, flaunting off your MyKad at the ticket counter will earn you a RM10 discount instead of the normal RM38 per head. The built-up area is pretty humongous so be prepared to spend approximately an hour and a half there - or more if you are an enthusiastic photographer. In my opinion, the seals and penguins are the main attractions there, hence you might want to time your visit with their feeding hours.

What are flamingoes doing in the Underwater World? O.o"

Spot the two little Marmosets?

Penguins playing hide-and-seek.

~~Dead fat cat.~~ Sleeping otter.

African Nemo?

Wow, look at the spiky, green seagrass!

Since the car rental duration expired at 1pm, we had to cut-short our photo snapping session and hurry back to the Kuah jetty. After a simple meal at the KFC as our lunch, we got stuck at the customs for a while before boarding our ferry back to Penang island. Alcoholics are to bear in mind that there is a certain limit on the amount of alcoholic drinks that you can carry out of Langkawi island, failing which will incur duty tax on the spot. If your ferry stops halfway in the middle of nowhere, fret not as there may be passengers dropping off or picking up at the Payar island, though this will burn another 30 minutes of your life away.

Total amount spent for the trip this time was less than RM700 for two, which is pretty okay I guess. No doubt that there may be many more interesting places that I did not manage to visit but to summarize it all up, the trip to Langkawi island WAS in fact, my barbeque pit. :)

嫁给我吗?

2009-07-25T22:20:00.001+08:00

When a yes is the sweetest music ever!

UUM very mini reunion # 2

2009-07-17T19:34:00.005+08:00

Time literally flies! The last time I managed to have at least three of my ex-coursemates out for a simple meal was two years ago... and one of them is in fact no longer in Penang for more than a year now.

The Three Musketeeress.

I find it funny that unlike two years ago, this time around, there was no hesitation involved in getting an unanimous agreement for the rendezvous venue. I guess this is one of the side effects of having to brave through all kind of daily challenges in this strange phase of life called adulthood - you simply accept whatever decisions made by others as long as they are not difficult to deal with.

-sigh-

Meeting up with old friends has never failed to evoke a sense of peculiarity in me. I was always left wondering how much have they changed and whether if they expected the same from me. For the first hour or so, I tend to be cautious on what comes out from my mouth and listen attentively as each of us has our very own versions of life story to tell - and keep to ourselves.

Time can really turn friends into strangers.

Perhaps we should arrange for much more frequent get-togethers? Life is, after all, too short for us to delve on its shortcomings.

ABCDE # 2

2009-07-07T13:17:00.005+08:00

They were unnecessarily delayed but nevertheless, the ingredients are finally here - though with no barbeque pit in sight - and boy, they are certainly a little pricey for something with an expiry date of barely 2 months away.

For the past few weeks, I have been frantically trying to source for a suitable barbeque pit that is slightly easier on my wallet and not as skyrocketing as the aforementioned ingredients. Alas, with the addition of an expiry clock, it has now come to a battle between money and time - both of which I am short of these days.

-sigh-

I guess I should have constructed additional pylons in the first place. :(

P.S. Another Blog Comments Disabled Entry.

Feigned innocence

2009-06-16T12:03:00.009+08:00

Recently I made a reservation on an item with a price tag of RM55.81. As that particular item was not readily available in the store, I was requested to pay a deposit of RM20 while waiting for it to get restocked. A receipt detailing the transaction was issued to me before I left in a jovial mood.

RM55.81 - RM20.00 = RM25.81

It was a few days later that I caught the following discrepancy in the receipt:

Estimated / Actual Cost: RM55.81
Deposit: RM20.00
Balance: RM25.81

Putting moral values aside, what would you do in this very scenario?

Storekeeper realized the miscalculation but you insist on paying only RM25.81 since it was stated so in the Balance column of the receipt?

You proactively inform the storekeeper about the mistake in the receipt and volunteer to complete the remaining payment of RM35.81?

As long as the storekeeper is not aware of it, you pretend not to notice the missing RM10 and proceed to pay him RM25.81? After all, you did not play any role that caused him to screw up in the first place.

Will your decision change if the amount unaccounted for is any number larger than RM10? RM100?

What about RM1,000? You can certainly do a lot with an extra RM1,000 in your disposal.

ABCDE # 1

2009-06-11T23:04:00.005+08:00

Hesitation is such a nuisance. One moment I was dressed up, ready to go and the next thing I knew, my jeans were halfway down my knees.

Look, the sky is kind of cloudy. It will probably rain later.

What about the fair on this coming weekend? Give it a miss again?

What is the point of having the ingredients when the barbeque pit is not ready?

-sigh-

I finally managed to drag my sorry ass out by convincing myself on the need to wash some eyes... only to discover that my favourite machine malfunctioned. Not one to be intimidated by such an insignificant obstacle, I pushed myself on and flabbergasted at my capability to comply with the list that I had drafted earlier on.

Up and down I went, throwing irrelevant points out the window only to end up doing something that I have never intended to; treading blindly onto a foreign path.

Small Beginnings Come Greater Things.

Pray for no potholes, anyone?

P.S. Another Blog Comments Disabled Entry.

Transforminators

2009-06-05T03:45:00.008+08:00

I recently watched the Terminator Salvation and boy, was I disappointed that it did not live up to the hype it garnered. Fine, I admit that it was pretty OK but I expected much more than that especially since we are talking about the Terminator series and it even starred Christian Bale, arguably the most popular actor at this point in time.

-sigh-

With the Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen just around the corner, a digital studio by the name of Black20 released a mash-up video combining these two totally-unrelated-yet-similar-themed movie series into one nice yet hilarious hybrid trailer.

I recommend you to watch the video in HQ and scripted below is the excerpt that I managed to make out for John Connor's commentary:

This is John Connor.
We've been fighting for a long time.

It was bad enough when we were fighting the Terminators.
Then the Transformers came.

Now we just call them the Transforminators.

They used to shoot at us.
Now they turn into sweet cars.

They're taking human prisoners.
Replicating human tissue.

And worst of all...
... eating all of our sand.

I nearly burst out laughing when John Connor shouted Why are you trashing my scene? You ARE trashing my scene! Don't shut me up!

However, I must say that hearing Optimus Prime uttering the Terminator's famous hasta la vista line sounded a little Protoss-ish to me, or maybe it was just me being a StarCraft fanboy. :P

Monkey Beach

2009-05-10T17:24:00.006+08:00

Around a month ago, 靖璇 tagged along with me for a hike to Monkey Beach which was organized by my colleagues. It has been 8 years since I last hiked to Kerachut Beach and I was very surprised to see that the entrance to these 2 beaches have changed so much since then.

The entrance archway.

This place has been commercialized to the extent that there are now a Penang National Park office building erected to register hikers and also boat service to transport those lazy bugs to their desired beaches for a fee.

The fisherman's village.

I find this trip very nostalgic as history repeated itself when 靖璇 got too tired halfway through the hike and I have to piggy-back her for a short distance until she regained her sight. :D

A few of us who took the boat there have the opportunity to visit a nearby lighthouse since they reached the beach much earlier and idling around. Needless to say, the panorama from the top of the lighthouse was simply breathtaking, considering the fact that Penang has been infamously known as Darul Sampah due to its lacklustre effort in keeping the pearl shining.

Hill view.

Sea view.

The weather on that day was both good - no rain - and bad as it was simply too hot for us to enjoy ourselves. Most of the time, we were either submerged in the sea or hiding under the shade of trees. Once in a while, we took a stroll along the beach when the cloud was kind enough to cover us from the scorching sun.

When it was not so hot.

You know it was just simply too hot when you have to open an umbrella under a tree.

See, I told you it was freaking hot that even the dog need to jump into the sea!

Even though this place was pretty far away from the stretch of hotels along the Batu Feringghi area, there was a large presence of foreign tourists who were having their family picnics.

Apart from the boat transport service which I have mentioned earlier, the fisherman's village also offers various type of water-based entertainment such as banana boat and jet ski. Heck, if you are too lazy - like us - they will also help you to prepare the ingredients & barbecue the food for you on the spot. Of course, this offer will only be made available if you are paying in advance and in the event that you cannot finish the food, they will help you do that as well.

Om nom nom nom.

I have to admit that the beach was pretty clean but the same cannot be applied to the nearby toilet. I think I shall spare you the toilet description in order not to spoil the mood that this entry was written upon.

My colleagues who went for the banana boat ride also claimed that there were a lot of jellyfishes in the sea, further away from the beach. :(

As the sun was still striking down hard, all of us decided to travel back by boat with our belly full and wallet / purse lighter by RM50.

Miraculously, no one showed the peace sign!

The only intriguing part of this trip was that I see no monkey.

-sigh-

No monkey, no problem!

Real problem

2009-04-29T17:53:00.004+08:00

So, I am under the impression that my first entry which emphasized on the word f*ck got people all worried and I sincerely apologize for that. I hope you understand that there are certain stuff that is not appropriate to be shared and when I say that, you can be darned sure that it is something much more serious than revealing the size of my balls.

Problem? How big a problem of mine can be?

Let me tell you something. Over the course of 3 years in Universiti Utara Malaysia, I met all kind of people but there was this happy-go-lucky lazy bum coursemate of mine, Mak Soon Hong who astonished me to no end. He would skip most of his lectures and touch no part in any group projects.

One day, I got so pissed off and decided to throw the whole Expert System project to him, expecting nothing to come up during project presentation but somehow, he managed to complete the project in time.

I still remember vividly how he once told me that if the problem can be solved with money, then it is never a problem.

That, my friends, is how severe my problem is.

-sigh-

In case you are wondering, my coursemate did not complete his degree with the reason unbeknownst to anybody.

Fuck all

2009-04-25T19:42:00.003+08:00

Fuck you, probability for there was never a 0% nor 100% to begin with.

And fuck you too, impossibility.

I'll reserve God for now, even though I cannot be sure that He even existed in the first place.

Uselessness

2009-04-23T17:24:00.000+08:00

Suffering...

... is knowing that you might - or might not - have hurt your loved one and yet, powerless in getting the problem resolved. :'(

-sigh-

How to speak fluent Japanese without saying a word

2009-04-15T21:43:00.006+08:00

I recently watched this series of YouTube clips by Ken Tanaka - assisted by RemiFebruary - which I find to be pretty hilarious and worth sharing.

He made a lot of videos with the intent of discovering his biological parents though I can't vouch on how true his claim is. Nevertheless, the How To Speak Fluent Japanese Without Saying A Word series has 3 clips at the moment so do enjoy them!

Part 1:

Part 2:

Part 3:

Answer: The Monty Hall Problem

2009-04-07T01:42:00.007+08:00

What a lousy number of participation I had for this simple quiz of mine. I guess my blog readers just hate to think too much or too complex.

-sigh-

I'll make this entry brief and short since it did not attract much in the first place.

The answer is, you should SWITCH. Not must, but should - unless you are the type that enjoys going against the law of probability.

My previous entry gave you two choices on three doors, which might not reflect much but if the host was to increase those doors to around 100, I believe that you should be able to see a much clearer picture now.

When you select the first door, you have undoubtedly a probability of 1/100 to strike it right.

Then, the host starts to open up 98 doors, one by one which revealed nothing but 98 goats behind them. Only two doors remain, one which you had initially selected while the other one which the host has mysteriously left closed.

Compare your first choice against the outcome that stands in front of you now. 1/100 versus 1/2. Do you still think that your first guess will bring you any closer to a brand new car?

For those who only understand mathematics equation, below are your tables with the first one calculating the odds if you had stayed:

Door A	Door B	Door C	Result
Car	Goat	Goat	Win
Goat	Car	Goat	Lose
Goat	Goat	Car	Lose

As you can see, you'll only have 1/3 probability in getting the car if you advocated to stay. Let us see what is the result if you switched:

Door A	Door B	Door C	Result
Car	Goat	Goat	Lose
Goat	Car	Goat	Win
Goat	Goat	Car	Win

The second table above is never required but in case that you are sceptical, here is you car key, Einstein.

VSS (Very Suey Siao)

2009-03-20T09:43:00.004+08:00

So by now everyone would have read that Dell is offering VSS (Voluntary Separation Scheme) package to its employees in all 3 plants in Malaysia. I find it amusing how the HR classified this news as confidential during the mass meeting held last Wednesday and yet, all major newspapers managed to catch wind of it and print it out by Thursday morning.

矛盾!

No thanks to that, I have barrage of calls to answer with everyone giving me their piece of mind about the VSS offer. Common logic says that I should reject it right away especially in the current state of world economy that we are in where vacancy is scarce and money is hard to come by. Unfortunately life, like a game of chess, requires us to think a few steps ahead and this changes the whole picture upside down.

Boss declared that our department is doing good financially so there is no need for us to worry. In fact, he prohibited us from applying the VSS, proclaiming that he will reject it on the spot.

Hmm... good boss or bad boss? From the outlook, he is defending his subordinates' well-being but we never know if his agenda was to prevent his team from being understaffed since he will have a hard time replacing outgoing underlings.

The usual path a company will take during a crisis of this proportion would be:

VSS
Eliminates OT
Cuts salary
Retrenchment

What my colleagues fear is that in the event that we stayed but the condition did not show any sign of improvement, we might have to go through another round of VSS, with this time being forced to apply instead. The offer might not be good by then as compared to the current formula that they proposed 2 days ago which will land me with 6 months worth of salary:

VSS = (years * 1.5 months) + 1 month + notice period (default = 2)

-sigh-

Truly indecisive indeed.

On the other hand, a lady employee was rumoured to be molested by an interviewee outside our cafeteria yesterday morning. I was not there to witness it first hand hence I am not able to validate this but the whole floor was talking about it so I guess there should be a speckle of truth in that rumour. It was unlucky for the perpetrator as well since the boyfriend of the lady whose breasts he fondled was watching her from his car after dropping her off about 10 meters away. A chase ensued before the guy was caught and subsequently, apprehended to the police.

What has this world comes to? =.="

I guess everyone in Dell is undergoing VSS after all.

Very suey siao.

Question: The Monty Hall Problem

2009-02-20T22:42:00.003+08:00

Have any of you watched the movie 21? This quiz is actually taken from the movie and I find it intriguing enough to be shared around. Do give it a try and let me know your answer. :)

Now, imagine yourself as a participant on a game show where you are presented with three doors in front of you. Let us call them Door A, Door B and Door C.

Behind one of these three doors is a brand new car while the rest are goats. You are required to guess the door that has the car behind it - unless you prefer a goat instead. :P

Sounds easy, right? Assuming that you pick Door A and the host - who knows what is behind the doors - intentionally opens Door C which sits a goat.

Good news, eh? Well, instead of revealing another door for you, the host offers you an opportunity to either stick with your initial choice or switch to Door B.

What say you? Stick or switch? And why?

As a reminder, please do not be a smart alec and browse through Google or Wikipedia for the answer. I just need your honest opinion. :)

My name is...

2009-02-11T03:29:00.019+08:00

I actually wanted to compose this entry as the second episode of Let's Talk About Work but I figured that any entry that has anything to do with my company name should be excluded from the series after all.

In my line of work, I usually address myself by my surname whenever I greet customer calls that reached my desk.

Me: Thank you for calling Dell, my name is Tan.

Sure, I am not the only Tan in the company but the logic behind this decision is to restrict myself from getting too friendly or comfortable with my customers. After all, there are company ethical policies to abide by.

In case you were wondering, yeah I do have some weird moments when I need to call certain customers with the same surname as I do.

Me: Good day, Mr. Tan. This is Tan calling from Dell.

Unfortunately, the same trick does not work for India customers. First of all, their slang is different and hence, most of them are not able to pronounce Tan as we do.

Me: Thank you for calling Dell, my name is Tan.
India customer: Sorry, what is your good name again?
Me: My name is Tan. Tango, Alpha, November. Tan.
India customer: Thang?
Me: =.=" Yes, my name is Thang.

Alas, this did not last long as well for India is such a big and vast country that they actually have a number of regions with different slangs.

Me: Thank you for calling Dell, my name is Thang.
India customer: Thang?
Me: Yes, how can I help you?
India customer: Is it Dan?
Me: *thinks for a while* You can call me Daniel. =.="

-sigh-

It was good for a year or two until recently when I received an India customer's email.

From: NALAWADE.XXXXXXXX@xxxxxxxx.com
Sent: Saturday, February 07, 2009 5:12 AM
To: XX, XXX; xxx_support_xxxxx@dell.com
Cc: XXXXXXXXSERVERADMIN@xxxxxxxx.com
Subject: RE: [WARNING - ENCRYPTED ATTACHMENT NOT VIRUS SCANNED]

Dear Danyl,

Danyl WTF?! Is the name Daniel so uncommon that they cannot even get it right? Fine, fine, Daniel is never my Christian name or whatsoever so it should not be any issue for me...

... until 2 days ago.

Me: Thank you for calling Dell, my name is Daniel.
India customer: My name is Danial. Can I have your good name?
Me: Sure, it is Daniel.
India customer: Yes, I am Danial. What is yours?
Me: Daniel.
India customer: Yes, tell me.
Me: *facepalm*

And I went...

Money REALLY No Enough

2009-02-05T22:20:00.018+08:00

Keep in mind that this is neither a rant nor blame post. This entry actually leans more towards getting feedback from the guys out there on a certain issue that is currently weighing down my shoulders. Of course, constructive opinions from the fairer sex are always welcomed as well. :)

So I was out at the bank yesterday to settle a few transactions and the amount of expenditures involved got me literally stunned for a moment there. In just a short span of 2 hours, my wallet was RM4605.15 lighter due to various loans & outstanding bills.

I am not the type of person who goes around chasing after wealth but damn, RM4605.15 is indeed an amount that is not easy to part with, especially since it concerns a number that is even much more than my monthly salary WTF?!

With this predicament clouding over my mind, I find it unfathomable how my colleagues and friends are able to afford a trip or two to some exotic countries or some cool gadgets that they toyed around for 2 months before dumping it aside for something new.

Where in the heaven did they milk their cash from? Is there some special cheat code that I need to shout out loud to get the sky to rain gold on my bed?

-sigh-

Here I am, still staring at my old list of necessities. It has been 2 years since I crossed over the boundary of slavery, into the stinky working society (that rhymes!) and I have yet to be able to put a tick to the Proposal Ring. Scroll down a little lower and there are still the Wedding and the House to ponder about. What about the Computer since mine has broken down a few months ago? In what order should I arrange their priorities?

This current dilemma of mine occasionally reminds me of an old song by Michael Finally Knows How To ~~Fuc~~ Rock; The Actor.

I'm not an actor I'm not a star
And I don't even have my own car~

Oh wait, I actually have a car. :P

Sometimes, I really do wonder which smart alec was the one who coined the term gentleman in the past. Look, I am a carefree guy with youthful intentions at heart and money should be the last thing for me to worry about. There are so many things that I want to do, locations to visit before I finally settle down and surrender myself to the gnawing jaw of age. Unfortunately, reality bites... and sucks too.

As I mentioned earlier, show me the money does not work and the list needs to be attended to sooner rather than later. I have tried to minimize my spending but I cannot help feeling something is wrong with my plan since those around me do not seem to have any problem splurging away.

No, I am not jealous. I am just curious for any shortcuts that I might have missed. Hmm... doesn't kill to try:

show me the money
show me the money
SHOW ME THE MONEY
*2 minutes ticked by but still no gold from the sky*

Cheated by the cheat code that does not work! :(

So, the question is, how do you guys - and girls - control your expenditures to the point that you have the heart to actually spend those hard-earned savings on things that are not related to your future needs? Let us see...

13% car loan
10% food
10% miscellaneous
10% father's allowance
10% savings plan premium
8% insurance premium
6.5% trust fund premium
5% Internet bill
2% motorcycle fuel
2% eletricity bill
2% flat maintenance
1% telephone bill

Take into account the remaining few deductions such as tax, SOCSO plus EPF and all that I have left is so puny that I do not even need a calculator to keep track of. Ah~ how pathetic it is to admit that the day to wed my sweetheart seems so distant away and owning a house is not something that I even dare to dream of. :'(

From what I read in local forums, a wedding event requires a budget of ±RM40,000. Gosh, I guess I am lucky after all to have friends like you all! A friend in need is a friend indeed, no?

For those of you who are so thick-skulled, *cough cough* bigger wedding ang pao *cough cough* :D

And dear 靖璇, this entry is not dedicated to you so there is nothing for you to feel bad about OK? ;)

Priestess of the Moon

2009-01-16T15:59:00.012+08:00

Around a month ago, paper models suddenly became the latest bug to hit almost everyone in the office. It was pretty interesting, considering the fact that none of them has ever knew of its existence all the while.

I collaborated with Wei Hong to build the Warcraft 3's Priestess of the Moon model.

Warriors of the night, ASSEMBLE! *rawr*

In case you find it ugly, kindly note that the 3D sprite as provided by Blizzard is more or less of the same quality.

Blizzard's Priestess of the Moon GIF.

Building this particular paper model is certainly not an easy task to accomplish. We took approximately a week to complete it, gluing it piece by piece between taking customer calls and replying emails.

Front view.

Side view.

We even built a black-and-white prototype to get some rough estimation on its difficulty level.

Meow~

My colleague, Rudy liked the concept so much that he built another 2 paper models all by himself.

Demonic form Illidan Stormrage.

Pandaren Brewmaster.

There are so many various paper model templates available on the Internet! Perhaps you can try your hand on one? :)

Too tired to get sick of the same shit

2009-01-12T21:42:00.003+08:00

I know I have not posted anything for quite some time. Heck, even the Weekly Work Schedule has been frozen in time for the past 2 weeks.

The thing is, I am just too tired to do anything.

Too tired to play computer games.
Too tired to even spare a few minutes to celebrate colleagues' birthday (sorry Alan).
Too tired to even smile when colleagues are attempting jokes... which are pretty lame most of the time.

By assuming that I only sleep 6 hours each day, I have approximately 18 hours of uptime. 9 to 11 hours are spent in the office and that accounts to a minimum 50% of my daily life time saying hello to Shit.

The Shit that I am referring to are not the customers. I have been serving them for more than 2 years now and I would have left very much earlier if I failed to come to terms with their never-ending amusing demands. The Shit here are people that are either proud or not ashamed of their wrong-doings, faults, total lack of discipline, laziness, lies and I will run out of breath if I were to go on any further.

Shit A is the catalyst that prompted my transfer from Silver team to Gold team. Based on the date as stipulated in his contract, he is a senior. Take the contract out of the picture and I see a guy with not only 0% role model quality but also an ever-increasing liability to the team. He has been let off the hook so many times that I was not even surprised when he got himself promoted not too long ago. Thanks to his new position, we are currently experiencing mass exodus of experienced analysts.

Shit B is one of my colleagues in the new team. This guy is the epitome of an absolute idiotic moron. He put himself under busy mode when he noticed that he will be the next analyst to receive customer calls even though he is doing nothing but standing around chatting about nonsensical stuffs. 2pm shift analyst has been allocated an hour of dinner time at 5.30pm but he intentionally takes his meal at 7pm when he is supposed to start his email shift at this particular hour. Despite all the misdeeds that he has committed, he acts all friendly with everyone and thinks that the world will welcome him with open arms. After all, he is the angel of the team, for he believes that either everyone will forgive and forget all his wrongdoings or he is too good in covering all the shitholes that no one will sense any immorality in him. I, for one will definitely love to welcome him with multiple jabs to his face if there was to be an open-for-all going on in my office.

Shit C is a person in management role; simpler term would be my boss even though I have more than 1 boss to report to. Unfortunately, I do not see any leadership value in him for everyone under him is totally detached from his control, degrading the whole team into a state of anarchy. As long as the team metrics are not affected, he will mindlessly perform his daily tasks of pulling reports after reports, like a zombie, oblivious to all the chaos that are going on in the team. He has absolutely no idea which analyst is supposed to fill into which shift even though he is the person responsible for planning the team work schedule. It was due to his incapability that Shit B is allowed to run rampant without a care in the world.

-sigh-

In case you were wondering, no, the list does not end here. :(

I simply cannot understand why on earth can't they just do what they are supposed to and put an end to all the torments that are plaguing the team.

It is getting so stressful that I just want to collapse into my bed and think about nothing (and that includes updating this blog of mine) each time I reach home from work.

Perhaps it is time for me to resign and move on to the greener pasture out there.

Perhaps it is time that I book myself a much-needed long leave and escape from this daily labyrinth of madness... temporarily.

I'm not drunk! hic

2008-12-14T07:25:00.006+08:00

OK, I admit I got myself KO-ed last night. I should have realized that it is never a good idea to drink wine the way beer is drank. :P

Many thanks to Wei Hong, Kar Sum and Chang Chan for getting me home in one piece... and with my anus intact. After 5 hours of sleep, my head is still heavy at the moment. I guess this is what they termed as hangover which is seriously no fun at all.

Since I can sleep no more (tried to for the past one hour to no avail), I surfed around the Internet and stumbled upon The Blog Readability Test. Yes, I do realize that this kind of random survey websites is never accurate but hey, I have nothing else to write since I cannot even think straight at all.

I volunteered my own blog as the first to get laughed at:

High school level? Not bad, but how about Tien Han's blog?

College undergraduate level WTF?! Hey, which blog entries of his that is much more matured compared to mine? Fine fine, let us see what is Phaik See's level then?

Haha... now, that is funny! *ahem* Do pardon my sarcasm but guess what, Kenny Sia is at the same level too so it is not that bad after all, eh?

OK OK, no more alcohol from today onwards!

RM0.50

2008-12-05T18:34:00.008+08:00

I am not sure if I am supposed to be happy with what I have grown into especially for these past few years. Is it for the better or for the worse?

I used to be a happy-go-lucky type of person, doing my best to squeeze every single day dry as if there would no tomorrow coming. In short, I was like the grasshopper where daily fulfillment came first before anything else.

However, slowly but surely, I am changing. Working life has inadvertently introduced me to a series of acquaintances such as Ms. Responsibilities, Mrs. Loans, Mdm. Savings, Mr. Bills and many more. All these new colleagues of mine have one thing in common; they love James Bond movies. Their favourite? No, not Tomorrow Never Dies but Tomorrow You Will Die.

The grasshopper, finding the need to do so, transformed himself into an ant to make hay while the sun shines, all in the name of tomorrow.

Some of you might argue that this is in fact a personal improvement, something that I should be proud of. Well, I definitely love to hear that but too bad, everything in this world is packaged together with the pairing of pros and cons tagging along. Take into consideration the following scenario:

Recently, I discovered that my August pay slip was short of RM400.50. I emailed the HR department & CC-ed in my current team boss. A few days later, HR replied that it could be due to my boss approving my OT claim late.

Come red.

Now, do bear in mind that I have changed a few bosses for the recent few months so I was not even sure which boss HR was referring to. From what I have calculated though, HR was the party at fault. With so much ambiguities floating around, I decided not to point fingers around and consulted my current team boss.

For your information, my company will allocate employees on standby an amount of RM50 per day. Boss advised me to claim 8 days of standby in my latest OT claim to clear the debt.

8 * RM50 = RM400.

But hey, company owed me RM400.50! Sensing my dissatisfaction, boss advised me further to forget about the RM0.50. Give and take, he said.

Give and take? Sure, I give company RM0.50 and company take it from me. That is the only give and take going on here!

One of my colleagues even teased me about the RM0.50 and offered to top it up for me from his own pocket. Somehow, I got the impression that no one was able to look at the injustice from my very own perspective.

-sigh-

I do not mind treating anyone to a meal if I feel like doing so for it is a voluntary intention. Heck, I do not even see any problem giving away RM100 to some charity bodies for it is my freedom. Robbing me off my RM0.50 when I worked for it is another issue altogether! It has been my philosophy that if it can happen once, it will happen twice. This time, it is just RM0.50 but how about next time when it involved more than that?

To most of the people out there, I am a damn calculative and stingy person. Yes and no. I am calculative but I am not stingy. At least, I have yet to stoop so slow as to tell everyone that I only have RM8 in my wallet all the time. :D

Frankly speaking, I do not know whether my response to the RM0.50 would have been any different had I continued being a grasshopper. Grasshopper or ant, to be or not to be?

Keychain mentality

2008-11-19T00:18:00.012+08:00

Before I proceed on any further, allow me to declare that as much of a racist as I can be, I do not intend to make this post as 1.

After reading the latest entry by CarinaSing, I cannot help but to ponder if the keychain mentality is applicable to all Chinese... or more precisely, Malaysian Chinese.

Now, I do not see any problem with someone going around the world but ended up getting me nothing for souvenir. However, you know something is definitely wrong when you keep getting keychains after keychains whenever your friends or colleagues returned from a vacation somewhere out there.

Take me as an example. I have been in my current company for almost 2 years and in that particular short duration, I have received at least 9 keychains.

Clockwise from top left: From Bali, Cameron Highlands, Paris, Singapore, Singapore and the rest, forgotten. :P

Why keychain? Why not something else? Is it due to the fact that keychain is the cheapest souvenir one can get from those foreign lands?

And tell me what am I supposed to do with all these keychains? I do have a lot of keys but am I supposed to have a keychain for each key? Look, my current keychain has been with me for years and so far, it is the keys that require replacement, not the keychain.

A free gift that came together with a shirt that I purchased in 2004.

It has now reached the level where anyone giving me another keychain will be indirectly identified as ridiculing my lack of opportunity to travel around. T^T

-sigh-

You may suggest that I take up keychain-collecting as my new hobby. Yes, I do collect badges and stamps but seriously, they are things of the past.

Badges from various schools and events such as gatherings and campfires.

Stamps from around the world.

Today, the only badge that sticks with me through rain and shine is the one I used to scan in and out of my company. And who needs stamps when we have email, otherwise known as the cancer that is killing off stamps. :P

At the end of the day, I do understand that the purpose of getting souvenir for friends is to let them have a taste of what that particular place has to offer. However, I am very certain that keychain - albeit cheap - is not the least bit suitable souvenir to best reflect the wow factor of the venue that you are visiting.

Take for example, Australia. Now what do you think will make people like me go crazy when someone mentioned Australia?

Kangaroo? What, are you a 7 years old kid?!

It is definitely none other than their... koala bear underwear! CarinaSing has disappointed me once when she failed to bring me 1 while she was away in Australia approximately 4 years ago.

And the nerve of her to fail me again when she recently went to Singapore and did not buy me...

... a Merlion underwear. T^T

Convocation Episode 3: Birthday Combo

2008-10-30T01:09:00.011+08:00

The past few weeks had been pretty eventful.

There was the weekend where I got a pair of twin sisters and myself lost in Selangor while trying to find our way back to Penang. Many thanks to Tien Han for his help in getting us out of the mess even though I was hoping that he would volunteer to drive his car out to lead us back into the highway. :D

Then there was the weekend where my girlfriend finally donned the famous mortar board on her head and officially recognised as a degree holder in Bachelor of Engineering (Process and Food). Words truly cannot describe how proud I was to see her in the maroon-coloured robe, smiling from ear-to-ear while receiving her transcript during her convocation ceremony.

Challenge: Try to notice what is wrong with this photo.

Time really flies. I am now very much aware of the fact that I no longer treat her the same way as I did in the past... even though she insisted that I still treat her as good as I did back then. I guess the following syntax best describes what I have in my mind at the moment:

public void excuse ()
{
  int responsibility;
  int time_For_Creativity;
  int resort_To_Monetary_Gift;
  int limit;

  for (int i = age; i < death; i++)
  {
    responsibility++;

    if (responsibility > limit)
    {
      time_For_Creativity--;

      if (time_For_Creativity < limit)
      {
        resort_To_Monetary_Gift++;
        System.out.println("-sigh-");
      }
    }
  }
}

For those who are not familiar with programming languages, it simply reads that as I grow older, there are more and more responsibilities to be taken care of which, consequently robbing me off the time that I need to come up with things that involve creativity. As a result, I become more and more inclined towards making purchase for gifts to show my affection rather than coming up with something by myself.

Nevertheless, I hope this situation will not remain long for I have taken the initiative to get things back to the way they were in the past. Last but not least, to my dear 靖璇, congratulations on your graduation and Happy Belated 24th Birthday! ^^

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri 2008

2008-10-10T02:47:00.004+08:00

I am very much aware that it is now 10 days too late to wish anyone Selamat Hari Raya. Well, you cannot really blame me for I have never truly experienced any Aidilfitri celebration until today when Syazwan brought to office 2 trays full of delicious chicken rendang and ketupat.

Ketupat.

Chicken rendang.

If I have known how mouth-watering the combination of chicken rendang and ketupat is, I swear I would have spent my past 25 years of Hari Raya Aidilfitri hunting down each and every single open house around my vicinity.

My lunch: 2 plates of chicken rendang and 4 pieces of ketupat.

Thank you very much Syazwan!

It was a good thing that I did not take any breakfast or lunch before reaching the office. :)

And... writing this entry really makes me hungry again. :(

My heart goes sha la la la la~

2008-10-05T11:52:00.005+08:00

Nothing really beats the satisfaction of spending quality time with your beloved one, especially when it involves something that both of you have never do before, in a pair.

Last Saturday was the first time both of us hit the karaoke center without the interruption of any 3rd party member, be it siblings or friends.

Weird style of holding the microphone. :D

Do not mind my staring eyes, please.

I definitely had a sweet time catching up to the coloured lyrics bar. XD

If only the Red Box staffs did not disrupt us so many times.

-sigh-

Nevertheless, Thank You very much for... everything. :)

Blowjob

2008-09-26T23:56:00.013+08:00

Long and black in colour. Not really fat, but enough to suffocate me once in a while.

Congratulations, I have just given the first blowjob in my life and of all the people in the world, I gave it to a doctor... holding a tube.

What is next? I have been molested and recently, orally violated. Am I going to get raped soon? :O

Joke aside, I have just came back from a night in the hospital... again. AGAIN?! Yes, I am very well aware of the small, dark thundering cloud above my head but there is clearly nothing I can do about it.

How come they always poke it in my right hand? :(

The reason I was admitted was no thanks due to the food poisoning episode. Dr. Chan suggested me to undergo the...

*takes a very deep breath*

... esophagogastroduodenoscopy procedure, which is a type of endoscopic diagnosis.

Having watched the House series, I assumed that endoscopy was all about swallowing a small tablet with tiny camera in it and let it flow all the way through the digestive system. How damn wrong I was!

I chose not to get sedated since I would like to experience new things at least once. Moreover, it was not anything dangerous like doing a bungee jumping or sky diving, right?

So there I was, lying on the hospital bed, waiting for my turn as the 2nd patient to get into the endoscopy room. However, what I heard from inside the room made my world turned upside down and inside out.

There was an uncle inside, wailing and crying like a tortured puppy trying to get away from its tormentor. All that noise really got me thinking whether I should have accepted the offer to sleep through the whole process in the first place. Around 3 minutes later, out came the uncle and in I went.

I was been given a ceramic-like mouth-guard to bite on after the nurse sprayed some bitter tasting liquid into my throat. Lying on my side, a long black tube was pushed into my throat and soon descended into my stomach.

The experience was definitely not even a single bit pleasant at all. Occasionally, my throat would try to swallow the tube, which caused it to knock against the hard tube wall and that, my friend, was damn painful. I also vomitted nothing but air around 6 times due to the giddiness of having the tube moving around in my body.

Dr. Chan complained that there was a lot of saliva in my stomach. If only I could speak, I would have told him to shove all the blame to the previous patient for his scary shrieks that caused me to swallow all those excessive saliva in fright. :P

After the 5 minutes of eternity, I was pushed out of the endoscopy room and back to the transition ward. Here, I waited another eternity of 6 hours for my 2-bedded room to be readied WTF?! The long wait could be considered a blessing in disguise anyway since it dawned on me on just how reliable my old friend, Tien Han and my girlfriend were by keeping me occupied thru SMS.

Thank you very much. :'(

By 5.30pm, I was in the 2-bedded room with my very own set of television. :D

Small but hey... that is much better than nothing!

My neighbour is a Chinese and he works in Agilent. Nothing much to describe about him since we just minded our own businesses. :P

I also found out that the way the food was presented and the frequency of them been served were different between each type of wards.

For example, the porridge in transition ward used normal orange coloured bowl like those in market noodle stalls. :(

Porridge for dinner.

Red bean soup at 8pm.

Oat cereal for breakfast.

Since there was nothing else to do, I just spent the day away watching television except the short period of time when my sister came to visit me in the evening.

The next day, Dr. Chan came to my bed and informed me the sort of result that was good to hear yet hate to know.

"Everything looks good."

If that was the case, then why the heaven am I having the discomfort now? =.="

-sigh-

As if that revelation was not bad enough, I was been informed that my company's insurance agency has the right to refuse to take up this case since the doctor did not find anything wrong with me.

Oh Dr. Chan, my wallet's fate now lies in your hand on how you write out the diagnosis report. T^T

To bribe or not to bribe?

2008-09-22T19:57:00.006+08:00

Afternoon shift is not as pleasant as I had always thought them to be. Yeah, there are less calls to take but that is about it.

On the other hand, if you start work at around 8am or 9am, chances are you will not be encountering any roadblocks due to the rush hour. The same theory is also applicable when you are leaving the office at around 5pm - 6pm.

Last Wednesday I was officially booked for the very first time due to expired motorcycle insurance.

The expiry date? 24th April 2008. Well, I have always thought that since the government has waived the motorcycle road tax, I am no longer required to keep my motorcycle insurance up-to-date. :P

Guess I am wrong then.

Of course, there was some dilly-dallies going on between the policeman and me. Both parties were asking each another on how to resolve the issue without having the need to issue a summons. I requested for his opinions and he replied me the same questions WTF?!

Come on Mr. Policeman, the ball is in your side of the court! I have a limitation here as there are possibilities that you will be arresting me should I suggested anything close to bribery.

-sigh-

Fine, I decided to take the ticket instead of risking myself for more serious offence such as attempting bribery. Moreover, this being the Ramadhan month, I should consider myself doing something holy by not enticing him with such an illegal income. :P

Upon reaching the office, I took a good look at my very first ticket. Then it dawned upon me that I might have to make myself present in a session court for this kind of offence WTF?!

My ex-boss was not helping at all by telling me that this offence is not compoundable and I would have to appear in front of a judge as stipulated on the ticket WTF?!

T^T

This afternoon, I tried my luck at the Petani Road police station.

RM300 discounted to RM70. :)

To my ex-boss, thanks for the bullshit nonetheless. :P

Moral of the story: The more vehicles on the road there are, the less likely the police will be doing roadblocks.

Ah Beng-ish

2008-09-19T14:41:00.005+08:00

Which is much closer to the characteristic of an Ah Beng's hairstyle?

A guy with longer-than-normal hairstyle like those Japanese or Korean superstars?

Or a guy with spiky-type hairstyle that require 15 minutes in front of the mirror to gel up?

It has been a long time - approximately 6 months ago - since I last got myself a haircut. All these years I have been trying to get my hair long enough to see how much it suited me. Alas, each time some weird unforeseen circumstances would crop up and prevented me from fulfilling this particular small desire of mine.

-sigh-

Just this month alone, I have 3 wedding dinners to attend and I do not want to present myself as a shabby, unkempt guy who might get mistaken as a roadside performer. :P

The funny thing about haircut is that I never really change my hairstyle. 98% of the time, I just requested for my hair to be cut as short as possible and as long as I can still comb it.

This time around, I was asked if I would like to keep my front hair length. Since I have to take off my glasses when I had the haircut, I was literally oblivious to what my hair looked like until the end.

Damn, I look so Ah Beng-ish WTF?!

Maybe I should not have cut my hair in order to give the bridegrooms the opportunity to appear as the most handsome of all during their wedding dinner? :D

Of TAOrrhea, sTAOmachache and consTAOpation

2008-09-03T19:16:00.005+08:00

Urgh...

I find it really disturbing that I have been plagued with all sort of illnesses since late last year. If things do not get any better soon, you can look forward to paying me a visit me in some bio-hazard institutes where they isolate sick people like me from infecting the world's population. :P

2 weeks ago, I had a great time taking dinner with my girlfriend and ex-coursemates in a very well-known restaurant. The food was delicious while the ambient was almost perfect with a water fountain that looked eerily similar to a penis urinating in the middle of the restaurant.

A day later, my whole world turned topsy-turvy with a lot of staring into my house toilet bowl due to...

I EXCRETED ORANGE OILY SHIT WTF?!

It looked so much like a bloody tap being turned on that I nearly screamed my lungs out. Upon a short moment of observation, I noticed that all the orange-coloured waste particles actually floated on the water surface, hence confirming my suspicion that they were oil and not blood. Not a pretty sight, I can assure you that. :P

After 2 days of Googling, Wikipedia came to the rescue with some revelations that the restaurant might have substituted their Butterfish dish with a type of fish called Escolar WTF?! Let us see what Wikipedia has to say about Escolar:

Escolar is also sold misleadingly as "butterfish", "oilfish" and "Hawaiian butter fish"; in Hawaii and Fiji, it is known as walu.

I ate PLATES of Butterfish!

The gastrointestinal symptoms, called "keriorrhoea", caused by these wax esters may include oily orange diarrhea, discharge, or leakage from the rectum that may smell of mineral oil.

Checked.

The discharge can stain clothing and occur without warning 30 minutes to 36 hours after consuming the fish.

Mine recovered on the 4th day.

What more do I have to say with all these matching symptoms? I even contemplated sueing the restaurant but decided not to proceed on due to insufficient evidence. :(

Can you imagine how humiliating it was to constantly rush into the toilet and check for any orange-coloured mark on my boxer and jeans? :'(

A week after the dinner and dragging until today, I am still suffering from:

constipation
a few spots of intermittent dull aching sensation in abdomen
bloated stomach which caused frequent burping

Even the company in-house clinic doctor commented that my abdomen is full of bowel movement noise as if stones are rolling through.

-sigh-

Moral of the story: Too much of anything is never a good thing...

... and f*ck TAO.

In need of money!

2008-08-24T16:38:00.007+08:00

Recently, I have been getting a number of calls from total strangers claiming to offer reasonable investment proposals.

Fine, I acknowledge the fact that I am an adult now and money is a major element to worry about. However, this fact itself does not translate to some sort of permissions for these so-called investors to continuously bug me with their offers.

What?! Do I have a big signboard reading In need of money! Please call me at 012 530 XXXX! hung around my neck and invisible only to myself?

I do not even know where they get my information from. My only guess would be that banks have some kind of underground business of sharing or selling customers' information to each another.

Anyway, there was this June who was so persistent in meeting up with me to explain how attractive her package was. After a few ill-timed calls from her, I decided to meet up with her face-to-face to end the ~~sexual~~ harassment, once and for all.

I find it disturbing that investors and insurance agents have so many things in common. It is like they are programmed to take out a piece of paper, draw a timeline and ask simple arithmetic questions such as:

June: You are now 25. Assuming that you retire at age 55, you have another 30 years of opportunity to earn as much as possible, right?
Me: Yes.
June: Now, assuming that you live until the age of 75, how many years do you have to survive with just your pension?
Me: 20 years?
June: Bingo!
Me: =.="

It is no secret that I have always resorted to coming up with all sort of lies and fabricated stories just to replace the almighty NO! when approached by these type of people. I do not know why but I am weak at saying No! repeatedly. I have declined June a few times through the telephone conversation but without any success at stopping her from calling me pointlessly.

-sigh-

Anyway, before I left the meeting, I managed to ask her where she got my contact number from. Turned out that one of my secondary school friends who took her package actually sold me out WTF?!

She did ask me for 1 or 2 friends' contact number. She might be pretty but too bad, I am not the type to be easily influenced by physical looks alone. :)

The only positive outcome of the short apppointment was a large cup of Ribena that she treated me to. Cheers!

Answer: RM462.50 friends

2008-08-07T18:06:00.009+08:00

Hmm... looks like I am not getting much response in my previous blog entry's survey. :(

-sigh-

Anyway, the truth is that my ex-coursemates are organizing a gathering at Genting Highlands on this coming 6th of December which will last for 3 days. Participation itself will cost me RM200.

At the same time, 8th of December is a public holiday due to Hari Raya Haji. Taking a leave on this day is equivalent to RM262.50 going down the drain.

The total is now RM462.50.

I also observed from the work schedule that 6th of December is the day where I have to work OT... which will net me another RM168.75.

The total has increased to RM631.25.

Assuming that I managed to get 1 of my colleagues to give me his / her OT on Sunday the 7th, that will be another RM225 going into my wallet.

Therefore, the grand total will be RM856.25.

Anyway, thanks to all who replied in my previous blog entry. :) I decided not to post any comment as it would have rendered this post entry useless.

Before I forget, just to let you all know that I have booked myself a place for the gathering. If it is possible for you to be at Genting Highlands on any of that 3 particular days, do give me a ring and let us meet up. :)

Question: RM462.50 friends

2008-07-31T00:00:00.003+08:00

Imagine yourself in a situation where you would like to meet up with some of your old friends. However, the catch is that you were required to pay RM462.50 in order for you to achieve this objective. What would your decision be?

How about RM631.25 then?

RM856.25?

To meet or not to meet? Do share with me your opinions.

Pimp My Blog

2008-07-22T05:41:00.008+08:00

Since the day I started this blog, I have been trying to reconstruct the overall look and design of the blog, phases by phases. I introduced a few minor elements such as the chatterbox, a work schedule table, some links and even reserved a small gap for advertisement - even though I am earning RM0.00 out of it due to insufficient visitors - to make the blog looked much livelier.

Unfortunately, they were all in vain as nothing bugged me more than the blog header that was packaged along with the template, which I deemed to be too plain and dull-looking.

After spending approximately 9 hours of clicking around in Adobe Photoshop Elements 6.0, I was finally satisfied with the new blog header.

Photo was taken during my visit to Tropical Spice Garden almost a year ago.

Filled with joy, I uploaded the new header and guess what did I see?

Serious misalignment WTF?! *facepalm*

As this was an issue with that particular template, I was left with no choice but to migrate to another one. *sigh*

Anyway, do give me comments about the new blog header. It was my second attempt in editing photos using the Adobe Photoshop Elements 6.0 hence there should be ample of room for improvement.

La Dolce Vita

2008-07-12T01:30:00.003+08:00

WARNING: Extremely long wall of text ahead... so long that it puts the Great Wall of China to shame! However, I can vouch that the article will definitely make an interesting read, therefore do kindly try to finish it.

Have any of you ever read 第一次的親密接觸 (clickity click to read the original novel online), authored by 蔡智恆 before?

Being a Chinese without any education on my native language, it is certainly disheartening that I do not possess any privilege of enjoying the story even for a single paragraph. Fortunately, I somehow stumbled upon a translated version - albeit shorter - written years ago by kolslorr.

Keep in mind again that the story below is not authored by me. Permission has been granted for the publicaton of the story and hence, all credits should go to kolslorr.

I met her on the net. How did it happen? I can't remember. But it seems to me that it is this 'little theory' which I declared in the cyberspace that caught her attention.

'If I have a million dollars, I would buy a house.
Do I have a million? No.
That's why I don't have a house.
If I have wings, I can fly.
Do I have wings? No.
So I can never fly.
If all the waters are drawn out of Pacific Ocean,
It still can't put off the flame of love between us.
Can all the waters of Pacific Ocean be drawn? No.
That's why I don't love you.

That's me, a typical science student. Firstly, you come up with an assumption, then you fit a suitable conclusion. If the proposed assumption doesn't stand at all, then everything is just bullshit. I guess this is what they call 'unromantic'. But she is an exception. She actually mailed me and said that I'm an 'interesting' person. Interesting? What a word to use on me. Its like using 'faithful' on Mr. Clinton. I thought this girl is either a low-IQ organism, or suffering from serious brain damage.

Anyway, her nick doesn't seems so bad. -FLYNDANCE-. that's quite a unique one. But I was warning myself that in this world-- the virtual world of Internet-- one never knows what might be lurking behind a beautiful nick. Talking from experience, most of the time it will be a 'dinosaur' in disguise, the only difference will be whether it is a carnivore or a herbivore. But, I know she is way different from a 'dinosaur'. She is special.

So I guess it's time for the appearance of FlyNDance. Ever since she mailed to tell me that I'm 'interesting', I was always wishing to meet her in #ajcrr. Too bad, lady luck was just not on my side. So I can only reply her letter to tell her that I will start to train myself to become an 'interesting' person, just to show that she is far-sighted. She replied my reply. I replied her reply to my reply. She again replied my reply to her reply etc... Actually what interested me the most is this paragraph she wrote in one of the mails....

I dance swiftly, amidst the crowd.
your glance on me be it surprise, be it admiration, it ain't gonna stop my rhythm
'cos it's not your glance that made me dance, it's my heart of youth.

I simply cannot relate this girl to any of the 'dinosaurs'. But if she really is a dinosaur, I'm willing to let her have her fill. Tye, my best pal, unfortunately noticed my little affair with FlyNDance and has been perpetually warning me about this. "HELLO!!! you don't even know what she looks like, why take the risk? maybe 'she' is a guy!!" I can't blame Tye for his ignorance. Ever since he was dumped by Sally in Sec 4, he has become a renowned 'playboy'. As the saying goes: "Once bitten, Twice shy". In this case, after Tye was bitten, he has mastered the art of skinning snakes alive, and making them into soup. But he has all the factors to be a playboy. I see him as the 19 year-old version of Brad Pitt. Tall and handsome, with a tongue that causes diabetes in every woman he targets. I don't think he can even remember how many girlfriends he has had.

I went online that night, log onto channel ajcrr and yes!! She is there. Before I can get over the surprise and the daze, she sent me a message.

hey slorr.. so late haven't slept??

Now what? Now what??!! okok, I had to calm down first. I swallowed hard on my saliva, took a few deep breaths. Now where is that Tye when I needed him most at such crucial moment? Somebody has to tell me what to say to her. How am I going to attract her with my pathetic humour that has gone stale?

slorr...me in a foul mood today.. can't sleep.. u??

what slorr... now when I read it twice in a row, I'm beginning to feel disgusted in that nick Tye gave me. Tye said, "who knows.. it might attract some innocent girls in talking to u."

I'm not feeling very good too.. so let's be sad together.

Finally squeezed out a sentence, but I can already feel beads of sweat forming on my forehead. Actually I'm not in a bad mood, I just wanna follow up her topic that's all. And if she asks for the reason for my feeling down, I can say, "Since you are feeling down, how can I ever be happy?" I know it sounds mushy, but Tye said: "MUSHINESS IS FUNDAMENTAL IN ALL COURTSHIPS."

And girls are a very weird species, they trust their ears far more than their eyes. So instead of doing 10 things to impress her, why not just say a sentence to move her.

Ok... but you haven't greet me yet..."

DAMN IT! How can I forget simple manners to girls. To think they call me 'MR COURTEOUS' in school. If this thing ever leaks out in school, I would lose all my female fans.

Nice to meet u... miss long-hair..

I've been wishing that she were keeping long hair. Tye said: "FlyNDance... hmm.. she would either be longhaired or a desperado, cos when girls dance, only 2 parts of them may fly: hair and skirt. So if she doesn't have long hair, that means her skirt 'Fly's when she dances. AH-HA!!.. this has a certain sexual hint in it...haha.."

eh?... how you know I got long hair?

BINGO!!.. heaven is on my side this time. It goes to prove that she is not DESPERADO. yesh!!..

not only that.. I also know you seldom wear skirt..

I increased the stake, if I m correct this time, peace on earth forever.

err... I guess you r right.. but how you know huh..?
HAHAHAHAHA.... I'm good...just guess...
ok.. hey slorr.. tell you wat.. me tired already.. you coming online tomorrow morning??
ya... y??
Please please please say u're coming too, if not I'm going to kill myself for letting you go tonight. I'll see ya tomorrow at 10 am then...good night...
er.. should be today at 10 am.. ok.. good night too

I just blurted out a last sentence.....Offline.
Suddenly I was so impressed by my performance just now. But is the season of spring really arriving for me?? I wish.

slorr... what a coincidence...
yeah... I'm not late. girls are weird. I thought we already had an arrangement, why do I have to pretend that its not. They must have watched too many movies and like to think that guys they met due to the thing called 'fate' is the best thing that can happen to their love life.
slorr.... you are talking nonsense...
NONSENSE???.. ok, let me tell you what nonsense. Summer's beach, the guy must be good at running, with broad shoulders, dark complexion with a tint of red, sparkling eyes and loud laughter. Then he will call out loud the name of the gal, running towards her, carry her and spin 3 rounds n an anticlockwise direction."
slorr.... you crazy already is it??
I crazy?.. ok.. Let's change a location then. Deep in the mountains, the guy must have long hair, gotta have the look of an artist, carries a sketching stand, a few pieces of drawings, and you can see birds stop over at his side. admiring his work. and there will be a girl who's the model.... most probably naked."
slorr.. but these all very romantic...
ROMANTIC??.. hello miss... romance only survive in novels and movies. In real life, the guy on the beach may step onto broken glass or the girl may be too heavy and it tore his arm muscles. Birds may just clear their waste on top of the guy in the mountains, or he might get a thrashing from the girl because he comments on the excess fats around the waist and hips."
slorr... you hate romance??..
I hate romance?... nope, I'm just using my knowledge of statistics to get a deduction, that guys must be TALL to be romantic, not HANDSOME!! Some love novels even portrayed the guy as normal looking, but no one dares to challenge the height of him!.. I object... because I'm not tall."
slorr.... objection overruled..."

I think I'm really outstandingly nothing to do, talking to her about these until noon.

slorr... are you hungry?...
ya... u??...
yes... guess its time for lunch... slorr.. then do you think we should....?? slorr... I'm just asking... I dun intend to have lunch with u...
Ok, good.. I'm not romantic... neither are u.

I had lunch with Tye and we talked about the conversation with FlyNDance this morning.

"You moron. Told her you are not romantic... you crazy?!.. you have disgraced me man... how can you make such a big mistake? I...I..." Tye grabbed a chicken wing with chopstick, and I can see the trembling of the hand and the wing. "There are 3 'don'ts' in chasing a gal. One...don't forget to be romantic. Two...don't be too honest. Three... don't be too stingy on the sugar in our speech. Noticed number one, you stupid?? What rubbish is that?? In mandarin, we say 'nan ren bu huai, nu ren bu ai', you should know this..."

"This I know, but it has been a controversial topic over centuries. Women aren't really that...cheap. So why would they only fall for 'bad guys' like me??"

"That's because 'bad guys' are usually romantic... those 'nice guys' are usually...dumdums...so she would rather choose a romantic 'bad guy' rather than any of those dumdums... in maths we call this C1... understand? Dumdum.." Oh, Tye is talking about maths!! Now I understand. No wonder I have always been left on the shelf. "In other words... girls wouldn't mind if you are not tall... if you are not handsome... they can bear with your inconsiderate acts...can forget your stupidity...but they can never forgive you if you are not romantic..."

"Come on, this is so exaggerated."

"Hey... most women have a 'knot' for romance.. just like most men have a 'knot' for virginity... to women they just can't understand how precious the thin layer of membrane is to men, same thing, men can't imagine how important women treats romance."

"This is bullshit! How come I've never heard of that?"

"The key word is 'knot'...if you can untie it... fine.. but how many have actually succeeded in that? Practically none..."

"Ok, fine. Now I've done it... so what should I do to remedy the situation?"

"Face it...you are hopeless already... I promise you I'll have a drink with you when you and her are over..."

"YOU SON-OF-A-B***H."

Mid-night. I am trying to concentrate on my physics notes. F=ma. v=u+at. It's really a wonder that nature can be explained by just a few formulas and equations, and this we call science. Then why is astrology and palmistry being labelled superstitious? Science should only be one of the ways to explain truth. What can't be explained by science, it doesn't necessarily mean that's its unreal. Close to 1am. Since I can't get anything into my head, I shall try my luck on net then. Maybe she is there...

slorr...u here finally... good night to u... :)

'FINALLY'? strange word to use it here. What is she doing here at this hour? Must be feeling down again.

yes... it is fate that brought me to you at this moment...

I am trying very hard to convince her that I'm a bit romantic.

slorr... nothing to do with fate...I waited for you for one hour already...
sure or not?.. for wat?..
to talk to u...or else I can't sleep...
sick izzit?... go and see a doctor.. :)

Let's continue our topic...what do you think of
relationships which begin from internet?

Oh my god... how should I answer her now?

it's.. it's very... romantic...

Indeed I'm not a good liar. Even my words are shaking now.

slorr... you bluffing... you not romantic kind what...

GAME OVER. I'm finished!.. no choice but to drink with Tye.

slorr.... you lagging?... or just don't want to reply me?
no... I'm wondering why is the sky so nice tonight?.."
nonono... dun try to shift the topic... slorr..."

Sigh... I give up... I asked for it myself.

Actually I think relationships started from cyberspace is considered as ROMANTIC, 'Cos romance gives people an impression of unreal, and cyberspace is virtual.
slorr....that's interesting..
surfers keep a safe distance from each other and usually 3 types of pple are produced in this way. The 1st type.... The 1st type being those who present themselves on net with their 'secondary personality'. Usually all of us consists of multiple personalities, and in everyday life, wat we present to the world is the 'primary personality', with the secondary one being suppressed, or maybe we dun even realised this other trait of us deep inside. so internet is the place where this side of us is revealed, both intentionally or without conscious knowledge."
izzit true?... wat about 2nd type..?
The 2nd type are those who will transform themselves into the kind of man/woman he/she would want to be. There's bound to be 1 or 2 characteristics that you particularly admire, too bad, sometimes these characteristics are just couldn't be found in you. Cyberspace is the perfect location for this transformation to occur.
slorr.... you sure you know what you are talking about?.. how about type 3?...
I know what i'm talking about, I read it from an article of TIMES magazine!! Type 3 will be those who transform themselves into characters which are impossible for them to become in real life. for example, if you r a gal, you may act as a man on net. you may even become BATMAN or SUPERMAN if you want."
hmm.. that's pretty amazing...
The 1st type is the 'faithful' type, 'cos its his own personality that is being presented on net. The 2nd type is the 'foolish' type, 'cos he knows only how to admire others, always forgets his own strong points. The 3rd type is the 'pathetic' type, 'cos he is wishing for something impossible."
slorr.... then you belong to what type?... and me?..
i don't wish to believe you r type 3, 'cos i m not. I crossed the possibility of type 1 'cos its too common, because i think you r special. being able to attract u, i think i'm at least a bit special. so we belong to type 2."
type 2.... then who you wish to become slorr..?
i certainly would like to become a person like Tye, humorous, romantic and eloquent, 'cos these are wat i'm lacking of..
slorr.... wat about me?..
YOU?.. i don't know. You want to FLY and DANCE, probably that means you wish to fully enjoy ur youth while you can. but if this is something you wish yet you can't achieve, den there's 2 possibilities: 1, you r ageing, 2, you r leaving the world."

I think I said something wrong, 'cos she didn't sent me anymore messages after this. I began to blame myself for being so perverted, why talk about these things? I should have discussed with her whether ZOE or FANN, who should be the queen of Caldecott Hill. Damn that TIMES magazine! Poisoned my mind. Maybe she's lagging. so I waited... and waited. Although it's just a few minutes, but it felt like several hours. I wanted to apologise, but don't know how to start. Until she sent me a message:

slorr... lets meet...

Without hesitation, I used the hand that I had used for over 18 years to wipe my ass and typed 'O-K'. I'm supposed to meet FlyNDance tonight, 8pm at the entrance of Macdonald's. The one beside YMCA. That's the best time and place to meet a girl you have never met before, according to Tye 'cos they would have taken their dinner by that time which means we can simply go inside the Macs and have some fries and coke. She will be wearing a whole set of coffee theme attire and I will be wearing my usual blues. This is our way of identification. She told me she is not those 'cute girls' I might think she is. I said nevermind, I'm not Brad Pitt either. Then she told me she has long ago given up on this hope already.

slorr... you r early...

While I was idling, a girl tapped my shoulders from my back. Although I was already mentally prepared for anything that's gonna appear in front of me, I was still astonished by this girl who stood in front of me now. If not for the coffee theme and that 'slorr', I would think she is only asking for directions. 'Cos she is one of those chio bus that can only be found on Orchard Road, usually while I am crossing the road. Maybe I suffered from a serious concussion due to the heavy blow, but my mind was extraordinarily calm.

"Had your dinner rite..? I think we should go inside the Macs first..."
"You're pretty smart huh.? A good way to save money indeed..."

GOSH~!!... she knows me so well, I can only give her an innocent smile back. Since she's so pretty, I ordered 2 LARGE cokes, and even ordered TWO packets of fries.

"This time you treat, next time i'll treat you..." I'm not falling for that, miss...but I'm glad she mentioned 'next time'. "slorr... were you disappointed when you saw me just now?.." DISAPPOINTED.? Are you drunk.?
"Why do you think I will be disappointed then?"
"'Cos i told you I'm not cute, so you must be quite disappointed when you saw me.." She is not making sense, but I know she is just trying to hint that she's actually cute.
"Then why did you have to lie that you are not cute?"
"slorr... I said I'm not cute... I didn't say I'm not pretty.." #$%$##%^*&%$@!! "But you are also quite....decent looking what.. It's not like what you described to me too.."

'DECENT'? A very vague word. To many girls, decent is equivalent to boring. One good thing is that she didn't lie to me about the fact that she is keeping long hair. She also has a fair complexion which reminds me of the HL milk I take almost everyday. It is now only that i found out she is from ACJC, but had spent her 1st 3 months in AJ. Sitting in front of each other, we talk about many things. From her obsession with coffee to my hobby of watching movies. In between, she had completely shaken off my misconception of 'if she is pretty, she is brainless'. She appears to be an attractive girl, both physically and character wise, talking, smiling to me, occasionally being a little sarcastic and nasty. It's like a dream. We left the Macs at around 10 pm. Since it was still early, I decided to send her home and fortunately, its just Ang Mo Kio, two MRT stops from mine. I would have a second thought if she's staying at Pasir Ris.

"slorr... congratulations.... you are officially permitted to date me from now on..." She said this before the lift door closed. Back at home, I realised that I hadn't asked for her real name. Maybe it's the influence of that stupid Tye: "Never ask a pretty girl her name the first time you meet her, 'cos there are already too many wolves out there dying to know, so she will be more interested in you if you act like you didn't care..." Then why didn't she ask for mine? Don't tell me there's a female version of Tye telling her not to? It's again 1am. Time to meet her in #ajcrr.

hi slorr..! you tired.?

Of course I'm tired after all the surprises she presented me. I would go straight for my bed if not for her. But why is she here also? Isn't she tired too?

long time no see.. how r u..?
slorr you crazy already? 2 hours ago only.. miss me?
A)yes.. B)of 'cos.. C)abuden...D)dying to see u...E)all of the above.... answer is E...
;:)...

Seems like she is really tired. Even the smiling face is yawning to me right now.

u wanna go for a movie tomorrow..?

Maybe i should ask her now, while she is half asleep, hoping that she will blur-blurly typed 'OK'.

should be no problem... what show.?

HOORAY!!... I'm cheering for her fatigue.

we decide what show tomorrow... anyway what's important is watch with who... not the show..

Tye's favourite line, but i am just borrowing it.

;:)...
you should go sleep now...
wait one little while... you haven't tell me you tired or not?
ok... a bit.... u?..
i'm exhausted.... but have to say good night to you 1st... slorr.. if not i can't sleep..
me too....

I can't believe I'm doing this SILLY business right now....

ok i tell you what.... i count 1,2,3... then we log off together...
ok.... good night slorr...
same to u..
1....
2...
3..

I never talk whenever I'm inside a cinema, and now it is the best time for my mouth to rest. So I spent the following 3 hours to admire this much-talked-about movie of the century, Titanic. I'm not a romantic person, so its perfectly understandable if I can't really appreciate this motion picture fully, except for all those stunning special effects. But something struck me when Jack said to Rose before he sank into the deep ocean..... "Rose, listen to me...listen....winning that ticket was the best thing that had happened to me...it brought me to you....and I'm thankful Rose....I'm thankful...."
Suddenly I felt much more fortunate than Jack, 'cos I dun have to risk my life to board Titanic, all I have to do is to switch on my PC every night. But he's one lucky guy too, 'cos he knows how to draw, and just look at how slowly he was drawing Rose, that made me blame myself for the lack of this talent. But to her, this movie wasn't just about drawings or special effects. I noticed that packet of tissue paper she was holding in her hands. And just when Rose said, "I promise... I will never let go, Jack... I'll never let go.." She opened up her sling bag and here comes the reserve handkerchief.

Damn that Celine Dion, why on earth did she have to sing that 'MY HEART WILL GO ON' at the end of the show? For all the female species inside the theatre, it's like 'MY TEARS WILL ALSO GO ON'
"Ok... movie ended... lets go...." I stood up, speaking to her gently, worried that every single word I breathed out might just crush onto her, and kill her. She continued to sit in that position, looking at me with those beautiful eyes that just came back from a swim. After awhile, she said... "slorr.... movie ended..... but life goes on.. am I rite.?" I nodded my head... but i just wished somebody might give me some clue of what she was saying.

Finally we managed to leave Orchard Cineplex. Since its still early, we decided to take a walk down the street. Along the way, she seems unusually quiet. So I guess Tye was rite about the 'TITANIC FLU'. He said that girls often got so mentally distressed after watching this show and that was the best time to launch an emotional attack on them. That's why Tye had watched Titanic for over 5 times roughly. Her eyes were focused on the path or the crowds but I know her mind was still left on Titanic, sinking with her, waiting for somebody to pull her up. I just kept my mouth shut 'cos I know I'm not a good swimmer. We walked to Plaza Singapura. Suddenly she stopped in front of a Christian Dior counter.

"slorr.. have you read a novel called 'Fragrance'?..."

"Err.. nope.... why do you ask?..."

"Look at this 'DOLCE VITA' from Christian Dior... It's what the guy bought for his girlfriend in the story on her birthday....and he told her 'DOLCE VITA' is Italian, meaning 'SWEET LIFE'..." She pointed to a bottle of perfume at the counter, but I was more interested at the price tag around the neck of the bottle.

"Oh... izzit?..."

"slorr... then do you consider today as 'sweet life'...?"

"At first i did... but some points are deducted since you started crying..."

"That means it can only be considered a little bit sweet. I'll buy the small bottle then..."

I insisted on paying for the perfume as her birthday present from me since I knew her birthday is coming soon so this kinda saves me a lot of trouble of finding a present for her. Luckily its just perfume. I would have to pawn my underwear if that guy in the story gives her girlfriend a diamond or gold bar.

"Are you hungry..? Wanna sit down and have something?..."

"I don't have appetite... what about you..?"

"You eat, I eat...." Her eyes are red again...... I'm such a fool. Finally got away from the noisy crowd at the Mrt station, walking on one of the streets of AMK ave 6. it's so quiet now that I even can hear the rhythm of her heartbeat.

"slorr... do you know what's the correct way of applying perfume.?" I shook my head. In fact, I had never used a perfume or cologne before. Medicated oil maybe. "First you apply some behind your ears... then your neck and wrists... after that spray some onto the air, then walk through it..."

"Sure or not? In that case this little bottle won't even be able to last you for 3 days...."

"slorr.. shall we try.?"

"We? You go ahead... I'm a MAN..."

She opened up that DOLCE VITA then applied some behind her ears, neck then her wrists ... and she really did spray some onto the air!!... WAH!!.. expensive stuffs ya know!!... Finally she stretched out her hands... facing up... enjoying the droplets that fell on her face...

"hahaha...."

"slorr... this is so fun!.... now its ur turn...."
She went through the same procedures with me and I can feel the coldness of her fingers. Maybe it's the perfume... I guess. "slorr... get ready... I'm going to spray!!" I imitated her.. face up...and walked through my first perfume rain. "slorr....lets have another round!!..."

"WHAT!!... serious?.." My money isn't easy to come by!! Before I can collect the broken pieces of my heart, she had walked through her second round. She was even more excited this time, hopping around, like her nick....a flying and dancing butterfly. Late night of AMK, the streets smell unusually nicer right now. Until we finished the whole of that DOLCE VITA.

"DOLCE VITA is exhausted... I guess this sweet time shall end now too....slorr.. I'll go up now.... tonight 1am. I won't be online, and you're not to do so too..."

"huh?....but why?...."

"go online at 12pm tomorrow.. you will know why....remember... only 12pm..." She turned and walked into the lift. At the same time, I saw an obvious pink patch behind her neck that is visible only now because she tied her hair. I looked up towards her window on the 4th floor from below, but it never lighted up.

I switched off the light in my room, engulfed in the absolute darkness 'cos i wished to have the same kind of feeling as her right now. I realised in complete darkness, the easiest mood one gets is loneliness. She must be lonely right now. Half asleep, I almost can see a beautiful butterfly, turning to ashes amidst the sea of flames and that patch behind her neck. From pink it became red... then burgundy, slowly, it swallowed me...Was it the cause of that can of beer just now? Suddenly I felt cold...and shaky.. and that coolness seemed to have come straight from my heart... the rate of my heartbeat was an exponential function of time as it got closer to 1am... USE A DIFFERENT NICK!! Checked. She isn't there...my heart was beating fast...but the tempo remained below healthy level........

Finally it's 12 pm, excited as I was, I logged on to the net, yet there was still no sign of FlyNDance. But there's a mail from her....

Dear slorr,
At first i thought it will be easier for me to settle down in the darkness... recollecting memories we have shared... but all i felt was loneliness...... can you feel it too?... I still can't change the habit of logging on at 1am... so i used a different nick to sneak into AJCRR... you dun blame me right?...:P... you weren't there... should i feel glad for ur obedience?.... you said both of us belonged to TYPE 2... the foolish type...maybe you r right!... 'cos I really do admire those who dares to fight for their desires... I stroke my hair gently when you said that i'm leaving the world... and a few strands of hair fell..... No!... doctor told me its not a terminal disease... and doctor aren't supposed to lie!!?... I still can live like a normal person... BUT CAN I?.. FlyNDance... is it really something i wont be able to do?... After the 1st meeting with you at Mcs... I started to realise that you r not only a virtual being living in the cyberspace... in reality you r strong, gentle and sensitive.... i can feel the defence wall of my heart is slowly breaking apart.... i'm defeated... I tied my hair today.. 'cos my friend told me that i look more attractive this way... I want you to remember my face as it is today... 'cos after today... everything may change.... But why didn't you ask for my real name?.. that's why i never asked for yours... hey i'm a girl.. :P... do you realised how i wish to have something more than a nick to take along with me?...Slorr... thank you for the DOLCE VITA... finally got a taste of what sweet times are like... but i am really sorry..... i just couldn't bear to say goodbye..... since it started from a mail.... it should end with a mail too.... Its been 3 months and 2 days since the very 1st mail... not a very long time but it isn't short either.... our story began from me... and I will end it. Maybe its what you said...'internet is fast and convenient, but it isn't perfect'.... I can send you my thoughts right away... but not my tears... Its about 5.30am now.... time to go.... by the time you receive this mail... i would be trying to settle down somewhere else.... i don't know....Good Bye.
With lotsa love,
FlyNDance

After reading her mail, I felt as if I had just experienced a roller-coaster ride which almost derailed. She had shown me the other side of her, soft and sensitive. For a couple of months, I tried to delude myself, to suppress my feelings whenever I started to think about her again. I told myself perpetually that she is just one virtual character that flies and dance in the net, but never in the real world. I became a fugitive, escaping from my PC, escaping from the internet and anything that has to do with coffee. Hid myself behind the piles of lecture notes, behind the crowd of people, trying to get rid of this thought of missing something in life. But I failed. I found out that it's not that I don't miss her, it's just that I had forgotten the passion that always comes along when you have something hanging on your mind all the time. It's like I cannot not breath, its just that I had forgotten the fact that I have been breathing in and out for the past 19 years. I can hold my breath for a while, but not forever. I have to find her.

"Err... i m looking for ... er.. FlyNDance...."

"HUH??..." 'Huh'. This is the exact word I was expecting from her. She seems to be FlyNDance's elder sister, 20++, looked quite a beauty too, even without any makeup. But of course, still can't be compared with her. I explained to her my purpose for knocking on the door and told her that I'm no stalker that she might think I am. Surprisingly, when I told her my disgusting nick, slorr, she appeared to be rather excited and quickly scribbled something on a small piece of paper and handed it to me.
"You should go and see her.."

SGH. Room 3-425. This is the first time I've ever stepped into the Singapore General Hospital. It's a dust-free space, everything looked so clean, tidy and arranged. But I don't like the feeling it gave me. I entered room 3-425 and she was there. in a deep sleep. I stood by her, watching. Her hair was still as long as before, laying across the soft, white pillow. Her face looked round now, I know it's the side-effect of the medicine... and the pinkish-red patch that was on her neck had spread to her face... appearing in a shape of a butterfly. Nevertheless, she was still the most beautiful butterfly I've ever seen. Her eyelashes twitched slightly.. she must be dreaming... what's that in her dream?? McDonald's fries and coke? Sinking Titanic? Or the rain at AMK ave 6? The room was getting darker as the clock approached 6pm. I wanted to switch on the light 'cos I hate to see her lying lonely under the shadow of a patient's room. But I'm worried that her dreams might be disturbed by the sudden light rays. While I was in a dilemma, her eyes opened slowly.

Her eyes were wide on me. then she turned away suddenly. I can only see her back at this moment. She lost weight. After a long time, she turned to face me again. rubbed her eyes...and smiled....
"slorr.. You're here.!"

"Yes. nice weather today.. isn't it.?"

"Yah.. sky also very nice today right?...heehee.."
'SKY VERY NICE'... i can still remember this was the conversation we had in one of our #ajcrr meetings...But she didn't realised that it's raining today... "slorr.... why r you standing there.. sit down.." Thanks for reminding me. I just found out that my legs were numbed due to the several hours of standing. "slorr... you lost weight..." ME? I thought I should be the one who's telling this to her!!?? "slorr. you hungry? Had your lunch? Food here isn't so good.. that's why patients like me always slim down abit.. apart from that.. its quite ok.. but sometimes I feel really bored without a PC here to talk to you.."
"slorr.. How's your mid-year? Sure did very well right?" WAIT A MINUTE!.. You're the one who's lying on bed right now!! Not me! Yet, I had nothing to ask her 'cos I was there to see her, not to find out the answers to those questions. Maybe now is the time for me to utter some touching lines like what's in the case of a movie. But I'm not a Romantic person. Moreover, movies are fiction, life isn't. I just wished that she could leave this place, which almost made me sick, as soon as possible. Back to AMK ave 6, back to ACJC, back to where she belonged and I promise she won't be alone anymore 'cos I will always be there. After a while, her mum was here to see her. Around the age of 50, slightly overweight. Other than the cheerful smile, she didn't really remind me of FlyNDance.

"Err...I think I've gotta go now... bye bye auntie.."

"You....You..." She sat up straight in a sudden, as though experiencing a tremendous shock.

"I'll be here again tomorrow.. and the day after tomorrow... until you leave this place..."

Before I went back home, I went to Plaza Singapura again to buy that Christian Dior Dolce Vita and I got the biggest bottle this time, one that she can even swim in. I try not to close my eyes that night, 'cos I want to go to her as soon as the first sun rays shoot into my room. I hired a cab, didn't want to waste too much time on bus.

"slorr.. You're here.. I've been waiting for you for a long time..."

"Had a good night's rest.?"

"Oh... I didn't allow myself to fall into a deep sleep 'cos I know you won't wake me up when you're here..."

"Then you should take a rest now..."

"Err... since you're here already... I don't think I can..."

I gave her the Dolce Vita, and we agreed that we would dance in the rain in front of SGH main entrance the day she's discharged. I dare not look straight at her 'cos theres a butterfly on her face. It was only last night before I leave SGH that I found out she's suffering from an illness called ERYSIPELAS. What the un-professionals call the BUTTERFLY DISEASE. But what I like is the coffee butterfly that is able to dance around freely, not that pinkish-red butterfly that settled on her pale complexion. Moreover, what's a butterfly if it can't fly?

"slorr.. why are you looking at me and not talking?" I don't know 'cos I noticed that she's getting weaker physically. I had a bad feeling about that. "slorr... i m thirsty... can you get me a drink?" I'm not leaving her at this moment. I can still remember a movie about this guy who went all the way to get red bean soup for his girlfriend who's on a sickbed and to find her lying silently on the white bedsheet when he came back... never to wake up again...

"Are you trying to get rid of me...like what's in that movie.?"

"slorr... movie is movie... life is life..."

MOVIE? LIFE? "But I thought you just had a drink? Anyway. so what can I get for u?"

"Ultimate Ice Blended.!!" This is a hospital!! Did she think I can find Coffee Bean everywhere on this island? Like Macdonald's? What's more, coffee wasn't suitable for her at that time...

"Err.... coffee isn't good for health.. order something else...ok?"

"So you know coffee isn't good for the body too... then you should cut down on your intake also ok?" I saw her smile appearing and there's a shine in her eyes. I realised that she's just trying to tell me not to drink too much coffee in the future. My heart seemed to have suffered from a heavy blow. This is not good. A taste of pH7 has started to fill my nose. If this is not going to stop, tears might be the next thing that appears in front of her. I recalled the chapter on reservoir and dam in my physics textbook and quickly applied the knowledge on me, even if it's just a few droplets.

"Ok... I promise... I'll try my best.."

"And try to sleep earlier in the future...and don't skip breakfast... It's important for you... and don't be too obsessed with blue.. it makes you look. troubled....and....." This doesn't sound good. It's like giving the final instructions before she...I can't bear to let her continue.

"Okok... I'll go get you a drink right away."

"slorr... is the machine far away? If it is, then it's ok.. i don't want it anymore..."

From my mental calculation, men would take 67 steps while women would take 85 steps to reach the vending machine right at that corner. Plus the time taken to purchase, average would take a total of 1.8-2.1 minutes... not very far... "Quite near.."

"slorr.... come back quick... I don't want to be alone for too long.... I hate that feeling.."

I didn't answer her....I just increased my pace...

X X X X X X X X X X

"Eh... It's late already... go to sleep.."
My mum was nagging at me again.
"Okok.... 10 more minutes..."
Until today, FlyNDance has left for more than 2 months. I still log on at 1am every night, but in channel DOLCE-VITA which was created by myself, with slorr and FlyNDance being the only 2 nicks inside, for 10 minutes. Although she won't be able to fly and dance in real life anymore, but I still wish that she could continue to do so in the virtual world. Even Tye has given up on me...
"She's gone.... why are you still doing this? For what?!!" Yet, even if that's the case, I can't allow her soul to be left at the corner of loneliness 'cos she said she hated the feeling of being alone.

I still remember there was a heavy downpour on that day. When I reached SGH, they told me a coffee butterfly flew away from her room at around 1am last night. After that, I can't remember. I just knew that I stood at the bus-stop for a whole day and I was all wet because of the rain. Even my face. I've been trying hard not to think of her over these two months. I've been hoping that her face won't appear in my mind every moment that I breath, but it's like hoping that the sky isn't blue, the grass isn't green, the stars do not twinkle at night. Basically, I was hoping for something impossible to happen. I can't believe that I'm of Type 2, even in real life.

Did i cry? NO WAY! I said it before, I'm not a romantic person, and this may be due to the efficiency in the hormones that constitutes emotions. Whenever I have the feeling of pH7, I'll browse through those forward jokes. Attention will then be shifted to those dim-witted, low-class jokes. So now everything is back to the way it was before I met her 9 months ago. Tye is still flirting around, and i'm still the old decent (dull) me. But I've stopped taking coffee and beer.
"Son... is this for u...?"
My mum handed me a letter she picked up in the mailbox this morning. I was surprised when I saw 'To: slorr...' written on the envelope. That's for me I guess. I opened it up and there was a piece of writing inside and another coffee envelope.

Slorr,
I'm FlyNDance's sister, i think this is how you are addressing her. I m sorry that i do not know your real name, although we'd met before. When i was packing her stuffs a few days ago, I found this letter with your name and address already written on it. So i posted it to you, because I believe this is what my sister intended to do.
Best wishes,
Xiao wen

The letter was sent 3 days ago, and there was another 'To: slorr...' followed by my home address written on the coffee envelope. But this handwriting was a lot nicer and the words seemed to be moving swiftly, like in a joyful dance. I had no time to figure out how she has gotten my home address. Did I give her in one of my mails? I tried to control my trembling hands. Slowly, I opened up the envelope. I found a photo, and half of a movie ticket inside. Apart from these, there was a blue letter with the familiar DOLCE VITA smell on it. The photo showed her, standing on a piece of grassland, wearing the same coffee theme attire during our first meeting at Macdonald's. Something was written at the back of it....

Dear slorr,
Coffee represents Pisces. that's me.
Blue represents Sagittarius. that's you.
A blue letter inside a coffee envelope....
Know what i mean.? :) Seeing me... do you feel like drinking coffee now? stop drooling!... :P
FlyNDance

I smiled.... bitterly. The contents of the blue letter is simple:

If I have one more day to live,
I want to be your girlfriend.
Do I have one more day? No.
Too bad. I can't be your girlfriend...
Not in this life.
If I have wings, I want to fly down from
Paradise just to see you.
Do I have wings? No.
Sadly, I can never see you again.
If all the water are drawn out of the bath-tub, it still can't put off the flame of love between us.
Can all the water in a bath-tub be drawn off?
Can.
So, yes. I LOVE YOU.

FlyNDance

My chest was torn apart. Tears broke through the dam I carefully constructed a long time ago. As proud for being as emotionless as I was, I can't pull back the salty wet substance that's on the whole of my face anymore. She has changed my 'little theory' and gotten back what I'd owed her... tears for 2 months....

X X X X X X X

Langkawi island

2008-07-07T12:19:00.006+08:00

For the past few months, my office has been going abuzz with a plan of a trip to the Langkawi island. All the while, I paid no heed to it, thinking that it was just another NATO - No Action, Talk Only.

Imagine my surprise when they actually managed to successfully book all the necessary ferry tickets, rooms and cars 2 weeks prior to the scheduled trip. Since I have never visited the legendary island before, I wasted no time in jumping on the bandwagon.

Initially, I planned to ask my girlfriend along since she has expressed interest of visiting the island years ago but never had the chance to do so. Unfortunately, I was being informed that we were not able to accept any additional participant as we have reached the maximum capacity for 3 cars and 6 hotel rooms.

As fate has it, 1 of my colleagues was not able to make it back to Penang in time. By then, it was already too late to rope my girlfriend in since it was 10 minutes before the ferry departure time.

超级白!

The ferry trip was much longer than what I have expected. Hence, there was ample of time for some candid camera moments.

Intoxicated by seasickness?

Perhaps it is a good time to introduce some of my colleagues here as well. Keep in mind though that a number of them are not in these photos as they were busy wandering about in the ferry.

Mr. Chang, Mr. Barry & Ms. Choo.

(e+ho)ng, Mr. John (now in Shell Putrajaya) & Mr. Yew.

Mr. Tan (my ex-boss), Mr. Steven & Mr. Saad.

Mr. Oh, Mr. Jimmy & Mr. Sim.

Ms. Lawrence & Ms. Lim.

Most of the photos in this blog entry are leeched from the trip's main photographer with his Nikon D60:

Alan.

The weather was not as sunny as I have hoped it to be. I hate to say this but I always get agitated easily whenever my plans were hampered by bad weather.

Gloomy horizon.

We actually managed to reach Langkawi island earlier than scheduled. We were in luck as all the cars that we booked - a Toyota Altis, a Honda Stream and a Toyota Wish - were available right on the spot to be picked up.

Toyota Altis.

Our first destination was to stop by somewhere for lunch. The food was nothing to be proud of but there were many tax-free shops just around the area. Since it was drizzling, we spent some time stocking up on chocolate, beer and wine supplies.

Drunkards' heaven!

On our way to the hotel, we dropped by at the Padang Beras Terbakar which was famous for... what else but burnt rice! Alas, it was extremely disappointing as there was no burnt rice to be seen at all.

Heck, even the sample of burnt rice was stolen WTF!?

A group photo as an evident that we were here.

With such a startling revelation, we decided to head straight to the hotel to check-in and took a short rest.

Lobby of Berjaya Langkawi Beach & Spa Resort.

We actually stayed in chalets instead of normal hotel rooms.

From here onwards, we basically divided ourselves into a few groups. I joined a few of my colleagues for a beach volleyball session before dipping myself into the not-so-impressive swimming pool to get rid of all those annoying sands. Yeah, I was pretty uncivilized.

I hate the peace sign but I do not know why I did it anyway.

Once everyone was cleaned up, we went out again for some Thai food dinner. Again, it was so-so with nothing much to brag about. I really miss the Thai food that I constantly had at Petronas cafeteria when I was still studying in Universiti Utara Malaysia. :'(

Before we returned to our chalets, my colleagues drove the bunch of us to the Dataran Lang to take a look at the famous ~~Statue of Liberty imitation~~ oversized eagle.

Cool aura photography effect by Alan.

It was on the way back to our chalets that something regrettable occurred. One of my colleagues drove too fast, too furious and I got so disturbed with the speed that I snapped at him with the taboo word f*cker. I hereby would like to apologize to him even though I have no plan to reveal who he was.

Once we were back at our chalets, all of us gathered in 1 of the rooms for a series of silly games where victims were punished by glugging down beers. Needless to say, I was pretty drunk by the time the clock hit 4am. Even the photographers were too drunk to capture any photo. :D

Nothing much actually happened on the next day. We basically:

packed all of our belongings
checked-out of the hotel
returned all the rented cars
had a quick lunch at the jetty
took the ferry back to Penang island

Overall, I find the trip a little too short as we did nothing much on the island. It could be that I have overestimated Langkawi island as a place with lots of interesting landmarks. However, from the example as shown in the Padang Beras Terbakar, I do feel that it was a blessing in disguise that we did not go around visiting all those legendary (kononnya la) locations or I might have ended up even much more disappointed than I am right now.

At the same time, it was definitely a wise choice too that I did not pull my girlfriend along for there was almost no time and place for us to be lovey-dovey at all... I have already got my hands full accompanying my colleagues all around the clock.

Last but not least, Langkawi island's beach is more or less equivalent to Penang island's beach... nothing to shout about. :P

VIVA-licious car

2008-06-30T22:44:00.002+08:00

The idea of getting myself a car has always been jumping around in my head since the day I was officially employed. Each time I decided to pay the showroom a visit, I brushed the intention off with the excuse that it was not the right time to do so.

To be frank, Penang is a pretty small island and I am not the type to enjoy travelling across the bridge to the mainland. The only person that I constantly fetch around would be my girlfriend and for the past 4 years, she was away in Serdang pursuing her academic degree. Approximately 70% of the time I spent on the road would be for work-related purpose and before I forget, 1/5 of my monthly salary was used to repay my PTPTN loan. With all these facts taken into consideration, a motorcycle is definitely a much better and wiser choice compared to a car.

Well a few months ago, those reasons might still be applicable. Things are very much different now. My girlfriend has already completed her degree and back in Penang. She has also found a job somewhere across the sea and need a transportation to move around. On the other hand, this country's fuel price was so screwed up that it resembled Wacoal's bra advertisement with the catch phrase of Up Up! If I did not get a car any sooner, I might have to pay even more than the current RM2.70 for a litre of petrol in the coming future.

All the rantings aside, allow me to introduce OUR very own first car, Perodua Viva EZ.

Front view.

I am not the type to keep myself up-to-date with all the car jargons hence you might get much more information about our car from the official Perodua homepage.

I know some of you out there find my choice of car and the timing of purchase questionable but let me assure you that I have no regret about it so far. The fuel consumption rate is one of the lowest and a week after the purchase, the bank interest rate for car loan actually increased from 3.75% to 4.1%. Phew!

This is 乌龟, co-owner of the car.

Initially, 乌龟 drove very slow, averaging at 40 km/h on a straight stretch and 20 km/h while navigating a turn. However, recently I found out that she has improved by leaps and bounds to the extent that I find it a challenge to keep up with her speed while we were on the highway.

乌龟 loves the Pearl Jade colour very much.

乌龟, just remember to drive safely, okie? :)

Sichuan earthquake

2008-06-25T19:20:00.009+08:00

A moment of silence as a gesture of respect to all the victims of the Sichuan earthquake.

For the past month, my house's bathroom and toilet looked like it has just survived the infamous earthquake.

My father standing on what used to be the toilet bowl.

The renovator promised my brother to completely overhaul the bathroom and toilet in a short duration of 3 weeks.

Progress after 2 weeks.

Without a bathroom, I have to:

put on multiple layers of baby powder before going to work without any bath
brush my teeth and wash my face in company toilet every morning
drop by at friends' house to bath after work and basketball game
remind myself not to drink too much water before going back home

At the same time, I also have to visit the company toilet everyday before leaving to ensure that I did not bring home any unfinished business... if you know what I mean.

Thank God, the renovation is now 100% completed and these are what they looked like:

Raised platform for washing machine.

Door into washroom.

No more wall separating the bathroom from the toilet.

I like the bi-fold door a lot. It saves space and exudes contemporary feeling which differentiate it away from those overused panel door that you see everywhere.

Bi-fold door.

Now, you must be wondering whether I have encountered any scenario of experiencing stomachache or full bladder while I was at home during the renovation period.

The answer is a bolded Yes! How do I resolve it? Well, I can safely tell you that preparing a few plastic bags in my bedroom do come in handy. ;)

Life transition

2008-05-31T21:22:00.010+08:00

Today is not just another normal sunny Saturday. My girlfriend is now employed and today is officially her 1st day at work. Believe it or not, her employer actually calculated feng shui on her behalf and determined that today is a good day to start her maiden career...

... either that or something serious must have happened that they need her to start work as soon as possible. XD

To be frank, I am not entirely satisfied with the terms and conditions as offered by her employer. However, with this being her chosen path, I believe that the best I could do is to supportively stand by her instead of going 101 reasons on why she should not accept the job in the first place. :P

Hmm... let us change our perspective to look at the bright side instead! A new life is waiting and there will be tons of stuff to learn and catch up on! Things could have got worse and it is not the end of the world anyway!

This morning when I fetch her to the office (where someone else will fetch her to the factory), I forgot to give her something important.

Prosperity ang pow for smooth working life ahead.

I wonder how much should I put inside this ang pow? What do you guys think? How much would you put if you were in my position? :/

B12: Vegetarian's nemesis

2008-05-20T18:50:00.010+08:00

For the record, I am now back to being an omnivorous creature. Yeah, I know I vowed to consume less meat but after what happened last week, I guess giving up meat is not as easy as I thought it to be.

3 weeks ago, I did not face much difficulty in regaining my basketball touch on the court.

A week later, I started to experience giddiness and fatigue after an hour into the game. Upon reaching home, I forewent the bath and took a nap but the situation did not improve by much. The exhaustion was so severe that going out of the house to buy myself a meal was totally out of the picture.

With not much option left, a quick hypothesis pointed to the lack of meat-related nutritions as 1 of the possible causes. As a result, I have to put my herbivorous lifestyle on hold and observe my condition for any noticeable improvement in the coming few days.

6 days went on with slight vertigo persistently lingering on in my head. With the floor constantly wobbling erratically, it did not take very long before Mr. Depression starts knocking on my mental door, whispering "Parkinson's Disease!" non-stop in the most rusky voice imaginable.

Yeah, label me paranoid, pessimistic or anything else but when you are stuck with the notion that something is going wrong in your head for the past few months long, you would be freaked out as much as I do, if not worse.

Anyway by the 7th day, the lightheadedness started to fade away little by little. Some simple Googling revealed that I might have been struck with Vitamin B12 deficiency due to imbalanced diet for the past month.

Now, to overcome this tiny obstacle, I will have to get some milk (yuck!) or alternatively, dietary supplements. The next question to ponder upon would be - is there any other nutritions that I might be lacking of apart from Vitamin B12 that could have caused similar symptoms?

SIGH~

Food is so complicated.

Tan Hong Ming in love

2008-05-06T21:35:00.003+08:00

I believe that many of you have seen this commercial before which was aired for a period of time during our 50th National Day, 2007. Simple and short, isn't it? Would you be surprised to know that this commercial has actually won a few international awards in the short span of 9 months?

I find it very nostalgic how Tan Hong Ming reminds me of my silly crush on a Malay primary school classmate of mine while I was still in Standard 3 or Standard 4 back then. Yeah, I know I should be concentrating on books instead of chasing after girls. The only difference would be instead of Ummi Qazrina, her name was Mazura Bt. Md. Yusoff. :P

Kar Sum's wedding dinner

2008-05-05T17:22:00.006+08:00

Last Saturday I travelled all the way to Sungai Petani to ~~look for Ah Yin~~ attend my colleague's wedding dinner. This would be the 2nd wedding dinner that I am making myself present as a friend - to either the bride or bridegroom.

Ms. Beh Yock Ling & Mr. Ng Kar Sum.

The dinner itself was held at the Kuantan Xianren Restaurant, a week earlier from the marriage ceremony. There will be a 2nd wedding dinner to be held at Kar Sum's residence in Ipoh on this coming 11th of May. A total of 5 cars fetching 14 souls occupied 2 tables in the restaurant.

Mei Yuen = photographer.

The dinner was overall pretty OK with nothing much to complain about... apart from some cockroaches roaming about and not-so-clean utensils. Bah, let us not take too much negativity into consideration for such a happy occasion.

May the 2 of you live happily ever after.

Iron Man

2008-05-02T12:22:00.005+08:00

Iron Man.

Breathtaking - is the only word that best describes the movie.

1st in the breathtaking list would be the Mark 3 armour, take no doubt about it. If you were to ask me, the Mark 3 armour actually put Transformers' transformation sequence to shame.

Evolution of Iron Man's armours.

Casting Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark played an essential role in the success of this movie as well. I could not think of any other better actors to portray Tony Stark as wacky as Robert Downey Jr. did. I guess my friend, Claire Lee would be very pleased with the latest development on this favourite actor of hers.

Next on the list would be Tony Stark's Malibu mansion and the gadgets in the basement itself. The mansion has all the to-die-for elements which I shall not elaborate here.

Last on the list would be the Malay Language translation of the title: Orang Besi. WTF?!

All right, enough air in my lungs now so let us stop taking in anymore breath. The movie started out slow, with a flashback on how Tony Stark ended up as a captive in Afghanistan. Once he returned to his Malibu mansion, the saliva-dripping session commenced with a few comical experiments and conversations to lighten up the fact-paced plot a little.

The only grudge I have against this movie would be the battle between Iron Man and Iron Monger which I deemed to be a little too ~~fast~~ short, too ~~furious~~ plain.

Nevertheless, I will still rate Iron Man as one of the few Marvel superhero movies that is truly entertaining (the other one would be Spiderman). Make sure you do not miss it! ;)

Shooting accurately with Jack Ryan

2008-04-28T00:29:00.002+08:00

Shooting is one of the many ways to score points in a basketball game. I have always believed that with deadly accuracy, a shooter would pose more of a threat than any other type of basketball players since shooting does not require much body contact to begin with.

I managed to find an article in SLAM ONLINE with 2 videos of Jack Ryan giving some tips on how to shoot better. I have even extracted these videos out and uploaded them onto YouTube as I do not know how long the videos would remain available in SLAM ONLINE.

I hope these videos would be of great help to my basketball friends. :)